Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
I can never truly leave. I know my boyfriend is not the one, he's verbally and physically abusive almost every time we see eachother. I keep holding on to my memory of him when we first met four years ago. So charming, now he charms his friends and bartenders, and is a monster to me... But still I stay, why... Bc its easier than finding someone new, maybe I believe I can't find anyone better like he says. I feel like this can't be it for me.. But see no other options. Struggling with extreme depression, anxiety, and relapse issues, alone... Wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy... I have a really important job interview tomorrow and can't sleep bc I'm thinking about who he is with instead of me. He always tells me he is busy doing like chores, or work and instead he's actually drinking at a bar. This can't be it.. It just can't.
I believe you CAN leave. I also believe that you can end the cycle of self-medicating. But, here's the thing....you need help to do that. And there is absolutely NO SHAME in that. Forget what society has shoved down our throats...that we all have to be individual and alone and the "me, me, me" BS!! Human beings were designed to survive and thrive in communities.....like this one right here on DS.....but also, out there in our real, tangible lives as well.
You need support to get the anxiety, depression, and relapse issues under control. And I have a feeling that if you focus on getting yourself well, you won't even want to be around the BF who treats you like dirt.
You CAN DO THIS. The fact that you are alive is a testament to that!
It's not easy, it's much like coming off a drug or alcohol. You will struggle, you may even relapse, but you can get out for good.
Great thing is, the further you get away from it, the more you see the abuse as what it really is, abuse. I've been out a year, and I'm still having eye opening moments when I think, what was I thinking?
My life is mine now. It's so cool.
Yes, you can leave.
What is more important to you?
Him (actually the image of him you hold in your memory, remember that image doesn't exist), or you?.
Do you want to leave for rest of your life without real love, happiness and respect?
That's what ahead of you if you stay with him.
Do you really want somebody who doesn't want you?
I know it sounds harsh, but......wake up girl. His doesn't deserve even single tear.
The choice is yours.
Yes, you have an options, you have many options, but you have to take off shades from your eyes.
You can do it everything you want to do ( believe me, I've been there and done that).
Make up your mind.
I tell you a little secret: "Gays are like busses, one will get away, another stops:.
Do I see a little smile on your face?
Good!!!!
Have a great interview, get a marvelous job and forget that loser.
Be happy (fake it, till make it), because happiness attract happiness.
In no time, you will meet somebody, who will love you and respect you.
In no time you will smile again.
Don't look at the closed door, because you will miss another opens for you.
Start re-connecting with friends and family. They will guide you, and help you when you are feeling weak. Also, consider starting an exercise regimine. It may sound silly, but getting out and going for a walk or hike is incredibly refreshing and rewarding.