Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
This is the first day "free" of him. I can't take my heart breaking anymore.
Yesterday was my birthday. He slammed a door on my head, breaking the door. I told him he's not mad at me, he's mad at himself. Somehow those words struck a cord and he told me he was going to go die, because that's what I truly wanted for my birthday. I spent the day calling police and hospitals and getting people to chase after him, just to find he was at the mall.
That was my birthday. I'm 25 as of yesterday. I've put up with it for 4 and a half years. I didn't know who I was, and still don't. All I know is pain.
No friends. No family. No real plan. He's says he's going to stay in one part of the house so we don't see each other. Untill I get a job, untill I can afford to move out.
It hurts and I can't stop crying. He mimicks the emotions on his face, but it's as though he feels nothing, there are no tears, no words. He is so quiet. He has no boundaries. When other people get involved, that's when he acts shocked and refers to everything as "too real". It isn't real when I'm in pain, just when other people see what he's doing. He won't get help. He says he will, but he doesn't. He is the reason that this is over, but it feels like my fault.
I just need somebody to tell me this isn't my fault. How do I get on with my life? I have to be strong enough. I put up with all the lies and pain for so long, that must count for something...but I don't know.
I don't want to patch things up again. I don't want to give him one more chance to destroy everything he touches. There's no children, I want them so badly but have known that if they're with this man it couldn't happen untill he got better. I feel like that will never happen, and I feel like my dreams died the day I turned 25. And all the birthday presents strewn about now...and I don't want them, they hurt me to look at them.
Please tell me someone knows what I'm going thru. I never want to see him again, but that makes it hard living in the same house. There's no way I can just leave, no shelters in the city would take me.
any advice would be appreciated. thanks for reading.
Yesterday was my birthday. He slammed a door on my head, breaking the door. I told him he's not mad at me, he's mad at himself. Somehow those words struck a cord and he told me he was going to go die, because that's what I truly wanted for my birthday. I spent the day calling police and hospitals and getting people to chase after him, just to find he was at the mall.
That was my birthday. I'm 25 as of yesterday. I've put up with it for 4 and a half years. I didn't know who I was, and still don't. All I know is pain.
No friends. No family. No real plan. He's says he's going to stay in one part of the house so we don't see each other. Untill I get a job, untill I can afford to move out.
It hurts and I can't stop crying. He mimicks the emotions on his face, but it's as though he feels nothing, there are no tears, no words. He is so quiet. He has no boundaries. When other people get involved, that's when he acts shocked and refers to everything as "too real". It isn't real when I'm in pain, just when other people see what he's doing. He won't get help. He says he will, but he doesn't. He is the reason that this is over, but it feels like my fault.
I just need somebody to tell me this isn't my fault. How do I get on with my life? I have to be strong enough. I put up with all the lies and pain for so long, that must count for something...but I don't know.
I don't want to patch things up again. I don't want to give him one more chance to destroy everything he touches. There's no children, I want them so badly but have known that if they're with this man it couldn't happen untill he got better. I feel like that will never happen, and I feel like my dreams died the day I turned 25. And all the birthday presents strewn about now...and I don't want them, they hurt me to look at them.
Please tell me someone knows what I'm going thru. I never want to see him again, but that makes it hard living in the same house. There's no way I can just leave, no shelters in the city would take me.
any advice would be appreciated. thanks for reading.
Oh my gosh, as much as you want children, please, please, please do not ever consider doing it with this man. It will be taking your problems and multiplying them by 100.
He's an abuser, and the sobering fact is there is extremely slight to no chance of him changing.
No, none of this is your fault. Nobody deserves or 'brings on' abuse. Please get somewhere safe, and see if you can get some counseling. You've been through so much, and need some time out to get some help and gain some clarity.
Things can be much, much better...there are many people here who are living proof of that.
Not,
not,
NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The dreams you feel that died
can be reborn in a healthier setting.
Get safe.
Then get counseling
so that you can heal from this
and learn how to never allow
this to happen to you again.
Then begin looking for
someone who is
healthy enough to be
in relationship, someone
who is healthy enough
to co-parent with you.
Please look into available
social services.
Take good care of yourself.
A better life is waiting for you.