Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
I have been trying so hard to keep connect to a very minimum and keep it to email and text and it has been going a little better.
Because I want to get into the habit of as little communication as possible, I called him so we can meet up to give him his childhood christmas decoractions, etc. which we originally agreed to do when it gets closer to christmas. I just want it over with now!
We agreed we would meet up this weekend sometime to exchange the items, but we got to talking about all the ornaments we aquired over the years. I am of the philosphy that he can have it all (just to get rid of him), except for the ornaments for my kids, I want those! Well of course, he doesn't agree. He wants to take one of the kids 1st ornaments & I take the other, I DO NOT WANT TO DO THAT!
There is nothing in the divorce agreement and the law says come to an agreement or take it to court. He is too cheap to take me to court over ornaments.
So my question, should I agree to what "he" wants or is it right for me to refuse & keep what I want (specifically my kids ornaments).
Because I want to get into the habit of as little communication as possible, I called him so we can meet up to give him his childhood christmas decoractions, etc. which we originally agreed to do when it gets closer to christmas. I just want it over with now!
We agreed we would meet up this weekend sometime to exchange the items, but we got to talking about all the ornaments we aquired over the years. I am of the philosphy that he can have it all (just to get rid of him), except for the ornaments for my kids, I want those! Well of course, he doesn't agree. He wants to take one of the kids 1st ornaments & I take the other, I DO NOT WANT TO DO THAT!
There is nothing in the divorce agreement and the law says come to an agreement or take it to court. He is too cheap to take me to court over ornaments.
So my question, should I agree to what "he" wants or is it right for me to refuse & keep what I want (specifically my kids ornaments).
Just my .02!
As for splitting them ... with a "normal" person, that could work well, with all the ornaments still going together after the holidays. But with him? From what you've shared? You'd never see any of those ornaments again. And most likely, having taken half of them this year, he'd want half what you had left next year (because you never gave him any, are you nuts?) and on it goes.
In my view, if someone can spent many years treating you with dishonesty and disrespect, there is no point trying to then wipe the slate clean and say "ok, now we'll start treating each other as equals" unless there's a REALLY good reason to think the other person is both capable of it and willing to do it. He's shown neither.
I told him neither of us would get them and they would just be put away for the kids and he said "What good does that do?". Sounds like a selfish answer to me.
I think I will go through all the stuff and give him what is his and leave it on the front porch and go out with the kids and text him telling him where it is to come and get it and if he doesn't by the end of the day I will take that as he doesn't want them. Thanks for the idea!
It just seems that your ex wants his, you want yours,
why in the world would he want to take the kids????
I would, not for 1 minute give him the kids ornaments. I bet when they are way older they will get enjoyment on having their ornaments on their own trees. Something would sure and happen to them if the ex had them.
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