Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
Hi everyone. I've been off for awhile, just trying to get things situated. I just wanted to thank all of you for your responses to my confused, chaotic, and scared posts! I can't always respond individually, but I wanted you to know how much I appreciate every one of you. You help me achieve some sense of sanity and help keep me motivated to do what needs to be done, instead of falling back into the abyss of denial and doubt. So THANK YOU and huge hugs!
Update: the kids and I are okay. We couldn't go to my sisters house...she had a rather disturbing incident happen with her husband that could potentially be a worse situation for my kids than the one we are in. But...I looked at a townhouse yesterday (secretly, of course), I have a consult with an attorney at 11 this morning (I feel SICK over this one), and I start my second job this afternoon at 2. I'm waiting to hear back about the town home and will keep you guys posted about meeting with attorney. I'm sick. I'm scared. I'm actually terrified, but every time I feel unsure, I get on here or I look at my youngest daughter and think how unfair this is to them. He is also helping by continuing to be a sh** so that's good news.
Update: the kids and I are okay. We couldn't go to my sisters house...she had a rather disturbing incident happen with her husband that could potentially be a worse situation for my kids than the one we are in. But...I looked at a townhouse yesterday (secretly, of course), I have a consult with an attorney at 11 this morning (I feel SICK over this one), and I start my second job this afternoon at 2. I'm waiting to hear back about the town home and will keep you guys posted about meeting with attorney. I'm sick. I'm scared. I'm actually terrified, but every time I feel unsure, I get on here or I look at my youngest daughter and think how unfair this is to them. He is also helping by continuing to be a sh** so that's good news.
It is scary and sickening, and yes terrifying to take these very important steps. I remember being terrified that I wouldn't have enough money and that I would be totally alone and there would be no one to help me in times of need. My kids were already grown and out by the time I left. But I look back and SEE the damage caused by my staying. I believe it will be easier to address the damage earlier than later. And I know it feels like you're damned if you stay and damned if you don't.
So trust yourself that you are doing the right thing for both you and your kids.
I'm keeping and your girls in my thoughts that you get the townhouse easily and effortlessly; that your new job goes well & you like it; and that the atty has some encouraging & helpful things to say.
Remember, one tiny baby step at a time and keep your eye on the light at the end of the tunnel.
~hugs~
that sick feeling is called bravery in the face of fear, you share it with heros and butt-kickers. it sucks. it SUCKS. but you are doing it anyway. aren't you amazing?
we are all sending positivity your way, your kids are lucky to have you.
However, she gave me some really good advice and a reality check for free, so there is that. For instance, I got confirmation that he's a liar, I can leave and I have enough that there's not much LEGALLY that he can do (which was a fear, that I was going to look flaky or worse), and some reassurance that he is never going to get custody and is unlikely to get unsupervised visitation with my girls (another fear). She said that was one positive to me waiting so long, they are now old enough to testify on their own behalf. I also have the option of leaving and filing for a limited divorce immediately (I cam file this on my own for $150 at the courthouse), which will then remove him from the house and give me child support immediately. She tells me I would get need based alimony as well, but truthfully I couldn't care less about that, so....
Anyway, gotta head to work. Thanks again!
Just want to say. . . . .
YYYyyyyyyyaaaaayyyyy, YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Great work!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!