Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
Hi Friends,
I have been missing in action for a little while. I have however logged on from time to time to read posts. :-) I finally moved into my condo. My son and I are very happy and very much at peace. I am still seeing my therapist every Saturday. I have gained so much strength from this group and my therapy sessions. I still had the one loose end to cut. Getting the ex's car out of my name. What a time I have been having with him. Now that my son and I moved into this place, I have been busy making it a home for us. I don't have everything I want, but it is very cozy and coming along nicely. I made the mistake of letting my ex come over a few times. Maybe it wasn't a mistake, because I realize how much I don't like him and how jealous of me he really is. My son who is a really good, well mannered kid, always changes into this person I don't recognize when he comes around. He gets angry and walks around with an attitude the whole time. That was a enough in itself. The ex has financially ruined me and when I had nothing to give, he distanced himself from me. He was probably with another supply. When he wasn't around, I realized how at peace and happy we are. When he did come around, I would literally chase him around, while he's going through my drawers and closets, begging for any and everything that wasn't nailed down. He even jumped up one day and started snapping pictures of my bed and home dcor. When I asked him why, he said because he likes it and wants someone to build him a headboard like mine. huh???? I was determined he would never come over again. On Friday, I went to check a parking ticket I received online. I wanted to see if the price of the ticket went up. His car came up, because it is registered in my name. I almost fainted. This dude has 6 violations and they are all over $100 each. My car could be taken away from me. When I confronted him, he gave me some bull about paying them. Yesterday, I decided no more. It was an exhausting day, but I fought back. I told him to give me the plates and I'm cancelling the insurance. He could have his title. I will not be used another day and I never want to see him again in life. He called me every bitch in the book. I ended up going to the police department to file a stolen car report. They called him and because of the true punk he is, he complied. It's over! I'm free and I'm happy about it. I feel I can finally close this chapter and move forward. I feel no remorse or anxiety. Now I'm overthinking why I don't feel sad about it. Has this happened to anyone else? Should I be worried that I don't regret what happened? Or, is this a side affect of being used to abuse? I also blocked him from calling or texting me. Whatever it is, I don't feel completely safe, so here I am to feel the warmth and support my friends here, who can only understand how I feel. xoxo
I have been missing in action for a little while. I have however logged on from time to time to read posts. :-) I finally moved into my condo. My son and I are very happy and very much at peace. I am still seeing my therapist every Saturday. I have gained so much strength from this group and my therapy sessions. I still had the one loose end to cut. Getting the ex's car out of my name. What a time I have been having with him. Now that my son and I moved into this place, I have been busy making it a home for us. I don't have everything I want, but it is very cozy and coming along nicely. I made the mistake of letting my ex come over a few times. Maybe it wasn't a mistake, because I realize how much I don't like him and how jealous of me he really is. My son who is a really good, well mannered kid, always changes into this person I don't recognize when he comes around. He gets angry and walks around with an attitude the whole time. That was a enough in itself. The ex has financially ruined me and when I had nothing to give, he distanced himself from me. He was probably with another supply. When he wasn't around, I realized how at peace and happy we are. When he did come around, I would literally chase him around, while he's going through my drawers and closets, begging for any and everything that wasn't nailed down. He even jumped up one day and started snapping pictures of my bed and home dcor. When I asked him why, he said because he likes it and wants someone to build him a headboard like mine. huh???? I was determined he would never come over again. On Friday, I went to check a parking ticket I received online. I wanted to see if the price of the ticket went up. His car came up, because it is registered in my name. I almost fainted. This dude has 6 violations and they are all over $100 each. My car could be taken away from me. When I confronted him, he gave me some bull about paying them. Yesterday, I decided no more. It was an exhausting day, but I fought back. I told him to give me the plates and I'm cancelling the insurance. He could have his title. I will not be used another day and I never want to see him again in life. He called me every bitch in the book. I ended up going to the police department to file a stolen car report. They called him and because of the true punk he is, he complied. It's over! I'm free and I'm happy about it. I feel I can finally close this chapter and move forward. I feel no remorse or anxiety. Now I'm overthinking why I don't feel sad about it. Has this happened to anyone else? Should I be worried that I don't regret what happened? Or, is this a side affect of being used to abuse? I also blocked him from calling or texting me. Whatever it is, I don't feel completely safe, so here I am to feel the warmth and support my friends here, who can only understand how I feel. xoxo
You sound amazingly strong and resolute. And your observation of your son when the ex came back...well, that pretty much sums it up. Good on you, girl.
You and I are kind of in the same place. I just this very day finished my remaining business with the ex. All through written correspondence....thankfully no direct in person contact! Honestly, if I saw him today I would shake my head and walk away. Pathetic human.
I don't worry for my safety in my situation, but only you know what your ex is capable of. Keep your guard up accordingly. In the meantime carry on the peace and joy with your son in your new home.
XOXO
BTW, this morning I was thinking about him and how entitled he felt about everything and all the material things he needed and wanted and how people are only for his gain. Interesting.
I actually looked after some children who I believe had a narcissistic and abusive parent (in their case, a mother), and they were quite difficult at first. I am sure it was because of the way she caused them to feel. But they quickly began to settle down with me and tell me more than they told her about their lives... somehow I think they would have done miles better away from the toxicity altogether, as you have noticed with your son getting away from this guy.
I think you are a brilliant mother, and you have done so well for both your son and yourself. Take care, and hope things just keep getting better for you! Huge hugs xxx
Your posts are providing strength and hope to others.
{{hugz}}
I plan on breaking away from my NH and gaining my freedom. It's so difficult remaining in this mess, but you and the other posters here give me hope.
Wishing you continued success! Big kudos to you! :)