Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
OMG........ He forgot his kids!!!!!!
He is so wrapped up in his girlfriend that he forgot to pick up his kids from daycare!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHO THE FK FORGETS THEIR KIDS? My stbx, thats who!!!!!!!!!!
This is his week with the kids and even though he is still living in MY house, we are getting the kids used to what it is going to be like (as best as possible) to the idea of being taken to school and picked up and taken care of by the parent the kids are going to be with that particular week.
He called me yesterday to tell me he had people coming into town and was not sure if he would be stuck there and asked if worse comes to worse would I be available to pick up the kids for him, I said yes. He then said "There should be no reason I can not get them, but just in case". I said ok, just text me or call me if you need me to get them. He said ok.
So..... I am home, it is 6:30pm, My son is to be picked up by 6pm and my daughter by 6:30 and he is usually home by this time so I call him because I am making dinner and need to know where they are. He answers and tells me he is on his way home from work (where he was, was 40 min from our house/kids daycares). I said "WHAT?!?!?!?!, Tell me you are kidding..... Tell me you picked up the kids". He got very quiet as if not to know what to say and said "I thought you were getting them......." I blew up, my son has now been sitting at his karate school for 30 min beyond the time of being picked up and my stbx asshole is 40 min from him................. I asked him what the FK he was doing and why he didn't get the kids. I reiterated our discussion earlier and reminded him that it is his week and it is very funny how I seem to be taking the kids so he can "leave for work early" and pick them up because "he is working late", which is code for spending time with his "beloved girlfriend"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He has the nerve to say to me "If I were you I would have called you to make sure you got the kids". It took everything in me not to fly through the phone and strangle him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I told him (knowing he has a girlfriend even though he denied it), that I don't what he was doing or where his head is and that I don't care, but he BETTER GET HIS FKN HEAD OUT OF HIS ASS AND BE A RESPONSIBLE FATHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He kept trying to blame me and asked me to call the schools. I said ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!! I told him that I would go and get the kids but he would have to figure out what he was going to tell the schools on why he did not come to pick up his kids on time.
By the time I got to my sons school it was an hour later then when he should have been picked up and my sons was in tears!!!!!!!!!!!! I was even more furious!!!!!!!!
What my stupid ass (sorry for all the profanity but I am still on fire over this) soon to be ex doesn't realize is that the cell phones are in MY name and I am the only one with access to the account and its information and I was able to verify that this son of a bitch who swore to me that he was stuck in meetings with upper management which was why he was late picking up his kids was NOT IN MEETINGS WITH UPPER MGT. He in fact left work at 4:48pm and was on the phone with his girlfriend for 2 fkn hours!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT IS WHY HE DIDN'T GET HIS KIDS!!!!!!!!!!
I want to confront him so bad but didn't want to do it in front of the kids and don't want to tip my hand at this point.
I am so furious I can spit fire!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Any advice???? Sorry for the length.
He is so wrapped up in his girlfriend that he forgot to pick up his kids from daycare!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHO THE FK FORGETS THEIR KIDS? My stbx, thats who!!!!!!!!!!
This is his week with the kids and even though he is still living in MY house, we are getting the kids used to what it is going to be like (as best as possible) to the idea of being taken to school and picked up and taken care of by the parent the kids are going to be with that particular week.
He called me yesterday to tell me he had people coming into town and was not sure if he would be stuck there and asked if worse comes to worse would I be available to pick up the kids for him, I said yes. He then said "There should be no reason I can not get them, but just in case". I said ok, just text me or call me if you need me to get them. He said ok.
So..... I am home, it is 6:30pm, My son is to be picked up by 6pm and my daughter by 6:30 and he is usually home by this time so I call him because I am making dinner and need to know where they are. He answers and tells me he is on his way home from work (where he was, was 40 min from our house/kids daycares). I said "WHAT?!?!?!?!, Tell me you are kidding..... Tell me you picked up the kids". He got very quiet as if not to know what to say and said "I thought you were getting them......." I blew up, my son has now been sitting at his karate school for 30 min beyond the time of being picked up and my stbx asshole is 40 min from him................. I asked him what the FK he was doing and why he didn't get the kids. I reiterated our discussion earlier and reminded him that it is his week and it is very funny how I seem to be taking the kids so he can "leave for work early" and pick them up because "he is working late", which is code for spending time with his "beloved girlfriend"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He has the nerve to say to me "If I were you I would have called you to make sure you got the kids". It took everything in me not to fly through the phone and strangle him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I told him (knowing he has a girlfriend even though he denied it), that I don't what he was doing or where his head is and that I don't care, but he BETTER GET HIS FKN HEAD OUT OF HIS ASS AND BE A RESPONSIBLE FATHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He kept trying to blame me and asked me to call the schools. I said ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!! I told him that I would go and get the kids but he would have to figure out what he was going to tell the schools on why he did not come to pick up his kids on time.
By the time I got to my sons school it was an hour later then when he should have been picked up and my sons was in tears!!!!!!!!!!!! I was even more furious!!!!!!!!
What my stupid ass (sorry for all the profanity but I am still on fire over this) soon to be ex doesn't realize is that the cell phones are in MY name and I am the only one with access to the account and its information and I was able to verify that this son of a bitch who swore to me that he was stuck in meetings with upper management which was why he was late picking up his kids was NOT IN MEETINGS WITH UPPER MGT. He in fact left work at 4:48pm and was on the phone with his girlfriend for 2 fkn hours!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT IS WHY HE DIDN'T GET HIS KIDS!!!!!!!!!!
I want to confront him so bad but didn't want to do it in front of the kids and don't want to tip my hand at this point.
I am so furious I can spit fire!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Any advice???? Sorry for the length.
Hmph.
Advice? Don't know. I think all I can say at this point is to document it, make sure you have a record of this and any other incident in case you need it in the future. Including his excuse, the fact you know the excuse was a lie, and the fact he told you that it was your responsibility to phone him to make sure he picked up the kids. If you ever end up having a legal fight with him over their care, that sort of comment will come in handy, because he's admitting that he's incapable of being responsible and should not be trusted with the kids.
As far as the schools go, that's one responsibility I WOULD take on, reason being what they have seen so far is that you picked up the kids late. If they need an explanation for that and it's left to him, at best he will say that there was a miscommunication in that he thought you agreed to pick them up but you didn't realise. At worst, he will say there WAS an agreement that you would pick them up but you just forgot.
And confronting him? It won't do a scrap of good. Confront him if you think it'll make you feel better, but don't expect to get through to him. This is just a symptom of his self-absorbed abusive personality. He's already managed to successfully (in his head) make the whole problem your responsibility and that's unlikely to change.
Saying that, I get why you would be spitting chips, so would I. I'm pretty damn furious as it is and they aren't even my kids!
Thank you all! =)