Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group

Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.

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jasgall 03/01/2010

three and a half years ago, god brought me out of abuse. when i was 11, my mom began abusing me. at 18, i was taken to a domestic violence shelter where i lived for six weeks and recieved free counsoling. my counsoler suggested i start watching a crime drama involving personal violent crimes after i became terrified after watching the movie "enough". at first, i thought she was crazy. i couldn't fathom how watching people getting raped and beaten could possibly help me. then, i started watching "law and order: svu". now i love it.

a recent episode involving a teenage girl who kills her abusive mom in self defense caused a flashback. the girl was describing why she killed her mom and went into detail aboout an abusive incident. i started to cry and scream at the t.v. this knot came in my stomach, and i felt like i'd hurl. episodes have gotten to me before, but NEVER like that. so my question is have any of you had this happen? a really horrible flashback after years of not having any? and do you think i should stop watching the show? thanks.-fallon

calmzone 03/01/2010

What? That seems odd that a counselor would expose you to violence in response to dealing with your own abuse?? Like trying to desensitize you??

As far as your reaction to this episode, it's a response to your own trauma. This was a tigger for you. Flashbacks are a common symptom of PTSD. You might want to search for a good trauma therapist who can help you with this. In the meantime, it might be a good idea not to 'take in' more trauma, even if it's just a show.

jasgall 03/01/2010

she suggested i start watching a show like "svu" after i explained that the police and cps were called 12+ times in 2 years. i even had 3 different madison center caseworkers come to my home (i am disabled.) no one did anything. my dad reported abuse, and it fell on deaf ears. she said it would help because i'd get to see abusers and other criminals cuffed, booked, and tried. closure was the goal. it has helped. i am just concerned because i have not had a flashback in so long. this one was particularly vivid and horrifying.

deleted_user 03/01/2010

I had a flashback tonight that I had forgotten about until I read someone else's post (not yours) and it made me flash back to the night my ex husband had his knee in my stomach pinned to the couch and his hands wrapped around my neck and last week I had a flashback of my dad chasing me around the house because he was in a rage, breaking down my door because I was running from him scared & locked my door and him ripping out the phone while I was on it calling for help and the worst flashback of all is the one I live over and over again with the severe psychological/verbal abuse/gaslighting in Feb. of last year with my boyfriend and watching him come on to a girl right in front of me not only once but 3 different times which I just learned over the weekend is abuse as well.. I have been re-triggored 3 times in the past month because I have seen her for the first time in a year and 1/2. I had forgotten about him "coming on" to her until I saw her and it triggored me so bad I started re-living the abuse he has inflicted on me by using her presence in his life as a reason to inflict in on me..so I too am experiencing flashbacks and me personally no I wouldn't watch SUV because I don't like to be triggored..everytime I see a belt it re-triggors me because of parts of my tramatizing childhood that I don't want to share at this time..It's good that the show has helped you get closure though so I guess maybe its something you may need to talk over with your therapist.

BedHog 03/02/2010

I'm not sure about your counselor's suggestion.
But I just recently had a flashback to being sexually harrassed by my mother's cousin when I was a young teenager. I had put it out of my mind for the most part, until recently when I was thinking about the window frame in my bathroom (it needs painting) and I suddenly flashed back to my teenage years to a moment when he was looking at me through the bathroom window and saying very lewd things to me. We lived far out in the country and I was all alone in the house at the time. I really DO NOT like having that in my thoughts at all.

deleted_user 03/02/2010

It seems she's trying to do some exposure therapy with you.

Don't forget: there's an off-button on the remote.

She's probably trying to get you to realize that there's an off-button in your head as well when your memories well up.

jasgall 03/02/2010

just so you all know, i no longer see her. i haven't since my freshman year of college. it was a group counsoling setting. after a while, it felt very awkward. i was the only person there who had been abused by a parent, and the other ladies felt it was their place to tell me what decisions to make as far as my court case was concerned. i felt very out of place. i probably should go back to some sort of counsoling because i developed an eating disorder too, but i just don't want to have to re-hash everything. and i don't some dr. phil-like therapist pinning my ED on my mom.

deleted_user 03/03/2010

Yeah, I have had flashbacks after some time of not having them. Sometimes they were specific in that I recalled specific things, but lately I just get these feelings that it seems maybe I just repressed for so long and now they are popping up. Its a bit confusing. If the show keeps triggering such things, I'd stop watching it.

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