Alright, so back in April I got out of a relationship with my girlfriend of 3 years, and we had been living together for about 2 of those. The reason it ended was that my girlfriend apparently found out that a female friend and I ended up accidentally drunkenly kissing at a bar one night when she threw me out of the house because she found a few NSFW tabs up on my browser; which didn't make sense from the get-go, since we had watched porn together before and she always said she didn't care if I did or not. So why then am I getting tossed out of a place I'm paying for, when I did something I didn't even know was wrong? Now, I know I probably shouldn't have put myself in a position like that, and what I did was wrong and I still feel bad about that, but in 3 years I hadn't so much as hung out with another woman 1-on-1, partially because my girlfriend was very jealous and possessive over me, but yet she actually went on a date with another guy when we first started dating, and had a very weird relationship with her friend John that would always ask her to go out of town with him and whatnot. It got to the point where I felt like the third wheel in my own relationship.

Anyway, I digress, she found out about what happened and immediately threw all of my shit out and called me a cheater and whatnot, and then officially broke up with me the next day. And for the first few weeks, I was completely heartbroken. She was the person I was planning on spending the rest of my life with, and I blamed myself completely for that relationship ending. I thought I just screwed up the best thing that had ever happened to me and I felt horrible. We talked about maybe trying to fix things, and that turned into a mess. We were supposed to meet up and be super honest with one another about what we were feeling, and she used it as an opportunity to attack me and dehumanize me. I heard stuff like "I told my friends that I hoped you would cheat on me so I could break up with you", and "you never made me laugh, played video games all the time, never knew what I needed because I had to tell you and it felt like giving orders", and none of those were really all that true. We laughed together constantly and had dozens of inside jokes, I played video games for about an hour at night every now and then after she had already gone to bed, and I'm not a mind reader so I don't know what you want me to do unless you communicate that with me. So I felt like I was just getting blamed for everything. But, in retrospect it brought up a few red flags:

1. 
   

   She accused me of not communicating well or "fighting back" with her, which was true towards the end of our relationship. However, for the previous 2.5 years, I was super open and honest with her and if she did something that I didn't like and I brought it up, it was WWIII. Ex. She asked me if she was annoying when she was drunk on her 21st birthday, and I lightheartedly replied that I thought she was a bit annoying, but she was having fun on her birthday with her friends that she hadn't seen in months, so it's completely understandable. She didn't talk to me for two days after that. Pretty much any time I'd criticize anything tiny about her, she'd completely blow up on me and it would start a massive fight. Anytime she'd have an issue with me, she'd cold shoulder me for 2-3 days and then send me this long, pissed off text while I was at work threatening to break up with me over stuff like forgetting to get her an eggroll with Chinese, forgetting to put the dishes away after I washed them, not eating the way she wanted me to, or just any tiny, insignificant thing. Pretty much 0 emotional loyalty on her part.

   
   


2. 
   

   Basically the entire relationship was on her terms. We always did stuff with her family, with her friends, and whatever she wanted to do. Anytime my family or friends were involved, she didn't want to come or would just complain about it the entire time. 

   
   


3. 
   

   She needed constant validation and adulation. Seriously. If I said she looked "cute" or "pretty", that wasn't enough. She HAD to be called beautiful all the time.

   
   


4. 
   

   She made more money than I did, and basically thought she was better than me the entire time.

   
   


5. 
   

   She lied to me about the number of people she slept with, and then yelled at me for forgetting about one of my partners.

   
   


6. 
   

   She'd make super passive aggressive comments while we were out with her family that would basically belittle me and make me look like some immature child, despite the fact that I'd drive 3 hours down with her to see her family and then just end up getting put to work the entire time.

   
   


7. 
   

   She'd always say that I never spent enough time with her, when I blocked off my entire weekend EVERY weekend for her, and she'd still see me every night after work. During those 3 years, I barely saw my friends, had to be home by 10:30 when I did; meanwhile she could just do whatever she wanted and I just had to be ok with it, and I thought she was insanely controlling and possessive.

   
   

Am I wrong for feeling this, or am I actually the bad guy here? Thanks in advance.