Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
Had a great therapy session today and all afternoon I have been feeling general anger toward the X. All the crazy rollercoaster over the last 5 years was totally insane. Now I can see it after 6 months of being away from him. I have broken NC several times and I am getting closer to blocking his number and maybe filing a Order of Protection, I can do that at my DV center.
I don't know why it hit me today, maybe because I am getting better and happy again. These people have a way of always being there. I wrote a list today of everything that happened in 5 years and I also use Ileens index cards. Just venting today and getting closer to be done. BTW this is National Domestic Violence Month. I have also been thinking about all the women who have been killed by their abusers and that makes me feel angry too. Someday I would like to work with women who are in this situation. Maybe I will.
Thanks for the rant.
I don't know why it hit me today, maybe because I am getting better and happy again. These people have a way of always being there. I wrote a list today of everything that happened in 5 years and I also use Ileens index cards. Just venting today and getting closer to be done. BTW this is National Domestic Violence Month. I have also been thinking about all the women who have been killed by their abusers and that makes me feel angry too. Someday I would like to work with women who are in this situation. Maybe I will.
Thanks for the rant.
I bet you would be good at working with women who are or have been living with an abuser. You would understand because you went through it. You should give it a shot.
I hope you are feeling a little better. I'm so very happy you got away!!!!
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Good for you, luv!!!!! I am SO happy for you!! I love your last couple sentences to your reply: "I really don't like him today. And that is very good." YES IT IS!!!!
ANGER
toward the abuser
who VIOLATED us,
. . . . that is HEALTHY.
That is
APPROPRIATE.
Then, when we
process that anger. . . .
that is also healthy.
Then the anger
will evenutally
diffuse and go away.
And THAT is also
healthy.
Victims/survivors
who don't get
appropriately angry
at having been abused
remain susceptible
to being abused again.
Anger when someone hurts us
is the appropriate response
for someone having hurt us.
Do you ever notice
that when we get
angry at our abuser
they tell us
we have no right
to be angry, or that
something is wrong
with us for being angry?
That's a distracting
counter-attack to
keep us apart
from our
natural,
appropriate emotions.
Honor your anger.
It's healthy.
Then process it
and move on.
That's healthy, as well.
Take good care.
I'm feeling angry finally too. At first broken hearted, sad, then I tried weeks of NC, back to becoming attached, sad....... now anger.... Ilene is right anger in this scenario is appropriate it's your inner self taking a stand against someone whom abused you.
For years I couldn't find my anger -kind of thankful it's here because it pushes me away from an abusive person.