When i try to express my feelings it is like talking to a wall. Even if he asks me a question I get no response. He gets angry every time I justify why I feel a certain way. For instance i found out from his 5 year old grandson that his X-wife has a nickname for me "He Man" why she chose that I do not know unless it is because I am very self sufficient and do not depend on a man for mine or my sons support while she can not drive a car and never has had a license, has only worked about 2 years out of her whole life while she is in her late 40's, and he is with me not her? So I believe it is jealousy but I am upset because she is saying this around the grandson and his 3 kids 2 of whom are grown ups almost 30. The 15 year old daughter grinned when the grandson showed her a he man picture on my kindle until I told her oh yeah your mom has a nickname for me did you know? She just stopped the grinning then I said why does she call me that and she just shrugged her shoulders. So I told my boyfriend how I was right not to go to his family reunion (which broke us up for two weeks) because she would be there since I have yet to be in that women's presence without her screaming and yelling and making a scene. He claims my reluctance to go was stupid and I was assuming something bad would happen when it wouldn't. I asked him when have I ever been around her and nothing has happened? Even her grown daughter jumps in and yells at me and they all say I shouldn't be there when she is there. They all gang up on me and usually it results in him and I breaking up for weeks or a month until he works on me for weeks to go back to him and he loves me blah blah. When I was telling him how I felt he said all you do is "blah blah blah" I dont want to hear it! He says cliche's all the time and never validates my feelings. Most popular "You shouldn't feel that way" "it isnt how you think it is"& "You are overreacting" These are the only replies I ever get never any understanding or compassion for my being hurt by his family. When I think about it and read all my journals back to 2008 which I did last night I wonder what the hell I am doing with him?!!! And to top it off when we break up he stays at her house and tells me they have nothing going on so why does she trip when he lives with me? My X had girlfriends and even had my son with them at times on weekends and my only concern was that they treat my son well and if there is no problem for my son no problem for me. I didn't care he was with women? I think that what she does and says around the little kids is emotional abuse for them because they like me and they probably do not understand it all. The 15 year old when she was 8,9, 10, & 11 her mom would hit her and scream at her if she found out she was around me on the weekends with her dad. I could never do that to my son , her daughter, or her grandson who I love and adore. The problem is more with my boyfriend because it seems like he blames me not her for the situations that come up because I say I don't like it and I feel he should stick up for me especially if we are around the whole family. His grown daughter and son who are almost 30 had his 50th birthday at the x-wifes house and i was not allowed to attend. How am I supposed to feel? He says "What my kids can't do anything for me?" I told him I do not feel you care about me and that i am a part of your life when these things happen. He really does not care how i feel about anything as long as I don't speak up for myself he is fine. As long as all our conversations are superficial having nothing to do with reality he is fine. Once I say any little thing that shows I think they do something wrong he gets angry at me, defensive, and wont talk. Silent treatment many times. Right now I am giving him the no sex treatment because I believe the only reason he wants me around is for when he feels like he wants sex. If he gets it he treats me like shit until he wants it again. I dont' want to do this anymore. This is not love, God must have better for me even if I am alone it would be better than this emotional roller coaster I have been riding for years. Since 2006!!!!!! What have I done?