Drunk, physically abusive & then some, has you "walking on eggshells", not married...

& you have a SON looking up to this poor excuse of a man?

'Sup with THAT?!?

SMH

I have been wondering, you said your family doesn't know about what's going on and that they are far...what will happen if you call them and tell them?

I am glad you can at least express how you feel here.

This place is helping me alot. I have had these things bottled up for so long. Like i said i told two people and didnt have good outcomes. So i was just dealing with it on my own and it was too much. I am glad i found this place.

I don't know what they would do or if they would even help me. I have wanted to tell them so many times but can't produce the words.

There should be a difference between telling two boys and your family, I hope...
I also hope you got your ear checked and if not that you will go and do it as self - care.
He cannot control your destiny and your son's with a bottle of alcohol. He should not be allowed to be that selfish.

I told one female and one male the female i found out he had told to be there for me because i needed someone to talk to. So I obviously don't talk to her about this stuff anymore because I can't trust that he isnt fishing for information from her.

I have an appointment for a follow up for my ear. a few days after my ear was damaged i ended up sick with viral bronchitis and a bacterial ear infection. The nurse reacted to my ear like it was in bad shape for awhile. some hearing has come back but it fades in and out at times.

I am sorry, for some reason I remembered two boys...

Did he ever try treatment for his drinking?

No he hasn't
Because he is able to work and go with out for periods of time he doesnt think he needs it. His brother has told him he needed anger management and therapy, he just blows off the suggestions.

And no worries i only specify both sexes.

So he doesn't have a perspective for change. He is on the'' what happens happens, suck it up because I love you'' wave I suppose...

Have your tried therapy for this?

I am looking into getting therapy.

That's some really good news, and maybe therapy will help you with the contact with your family.

You said you are on the verge of a new career path. His alcohol problem should not stop you.

I hope he treats your son well at least and that he is as unaffected as he can be at this point.

He is really good to my son. My son has heard my bf yell at me but has not actually seen the violence.
My boyfriend actually stated he would be afraid of me if he treated my son wrong.
I am protective of my son despite what i am going through my son is innocent and i refuse to let anyone hurt him. I should be that protective of myself and i am fully aware of this.

Finally, I want to offer my support anytime you feel anxious and you need you need to talk to someone. You can message me and I will be there for you.
You are making a progress and that great news.

I just sent a friend request. Thank you so much.

I really do appreciate the advice and concern I have received here. It does make me feel less like i deserve this kind of treatment.

"""""""""""""""""My son has heard my bf yell at me but has not actually seen the violence.""""""""""""""""""


I'm sorry but I believe you
are probably underestimating
how your son is being effected
by this abuser attacking you
so violently.

A man yelling at a partner
IS violence.

No one is entitled to
yell at anyone else.
We're human beings
with all manner of
means of expression
other than yelling.

Please forgive me if this
sounds critical, but I believe
your son is being effected
and possibly emotionally
damaged by hearing you
being yelled at. At best,
your son could grow up
to believe it's acceptable
to yell at his partner. I
won't even proceed to
what could be worse.

Please don't minimize
how badly your son is
being effected by living
in a household where
his mother is regularly
in danger.