Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
Hi all! I have been offline for a few days. My ex husband moved into his house yesterday, I know it's normal to feel this way but I DON'T LIKE IT! :(
Not really sad, but a little tiny bit. More just weird because for the first time in my life I'm on my own. As I sit here writing I am crying and I don't know why. I hated how he made me feel, I have an amazing man that adores me for ME (what a concept right?).
Everyone tells me I shouldn't give a care in the world. He walks around normal, asking me for dating advice as if we are best of friends and I give it to him (is this stupid?, I mean I want the next one to at least have a little bit of a chance at happiness even though I know it is not up to me and it is not gonna happen). Is this sick? Is this normal?
No one is happy with him for what he has done to me and neither am I yet I still seem to struggle with not looking back. I can't go no contact because of our kids and I don't care or love him anymore so I just don't understand these emotes even if they are normal.
Work is going really bad, going through my divorce and all the emotions of everything you all have seen me go through took a big toll on me but in may when I made the final last time decision to go through with my divorce I got back on track and became focused and was back on top when it came to my job. I have NEVER been in trouble at work in all the years I have been there. I was told by one of my employees that report to me that my boss told her things about my divorce and my personal life that was meant to be kept confidential at my request. From that point forward I stopped telling my boss anything and that is when the pressure was put on me and now it is like I have a target on my back.
I am just so stressed and my "normal" is no longer normal and I don't know if I like it. =(
Not really sad, but a little tiny bit. More just weird because for the first time in my life I'm on my own. As I sit here writing I am crying and I don't know why. I hated how he made me feel, I have an amazing man that adores me for ME (what a concept right?).
Everyone tells me I shouldn't give a care in the world. He walks around normal, asking me for dating advice as if we are best of friends and I give it to him (is this stupid?, I mean I want the next one to at least have a little bit of a chance at happiness even though I know it is not up to me and it is not gonna happen). Is this sick? Is this normal?
No one is happy with him for what he has done to me and neither am I yet I still seem to struggle with not looking back. I can't go no contact because of our kids and I don't care or love him anymore so I just don't understand these emotes even if they are normal.
Work is going really bad, going through my divorce and all the emotions of everything you all have seen me go through took a big toll on me but in may when I made the final last time decision to go through with my divorce I got back on track and became focused and was back on top when it came to my job. I have NEVER been in trouble at work in all the years I have been there. I was told by one of my employees that report to me that my boss told her things about my divorce and my personal life that was meant to be kept confidential at my request. From that point forward I stopped telling my boss anything and that is when the pressure was put on me and now it is like I have a target on my back.
I am just so stressed and my "normal" is no longer normal and I don't know if I like it. =(
I am so happy and excited for you! I know that is not what you want to hear right now, but you do give m hope.
Work will get better too.
If it doesn't you are free to make good choices for yourself now!
Choices!!!!!! Yes, you will have choices and opinions, and a opportunities.
Hang in there! YOU CAN DO THIS!
It sounds to me like you have a cluster of things going on related to the divorce, but not exactly all about the divorce, and it might help to do some separation.
There's the divorce, and everything I've read is that it's normal to feel sad. Aside from the emotions, it's a change in your way of life and that's always tough to deal with.
As for offering him dating advice, IMHO I think it's not the time for that. Too early, and too inconsiderate of him to ask. I think for most of us, people with normal emotions, it takes time for them to stabilize. But it sounds like he's the type that doesn't really have emotions, so it's no big deal for him.
What happened at your work is unfortunate, and although it is tied to the divorce it's not really about the divorce; it's about someone unfairly breaking your trust. It could have happened over any event and the timing is unfortunate.
I've had clusters of things that seem related in my life, and the only comforting thing I can say is that they do pass like weather systems.
However, with my more recently acquired skills, I'm much more able to deal with them, and the technique depends a lot on separating things out.
Also depends a lot on trusting your own judgement and feelings. From what I've read, you're kind of caught in a storm of other people's thoughts and feelings, so it might help to reel things in a bit and focus on YOU for a bit!
You're really awesome and you'll make it through! And I do believe you'll land in a better place!
what happened
to you at work!!!!
Feeling weird
in this situation
overall, is
pretty typical.
Please hang in.
It WILL get better.
Sending you hugs
and healing wishes.
Take good care.
It is a total shame that your boss is such a gossiping jerk. I'm really sorry you have to deal with him.
I am sorry you are feeling weird, I'm hoping it's just a tempory reaction to all the stress you have been under--maybe a release or something, and I hope it goes away soon
((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))
I'm sorry that happened to you at work... That is so unprofessional of your boss... Something similar happened to me as someone overheard me talking to my boss (who is also someone I talk with a lot) and somehow most of my work knows what a jerk my husband is (or it could be that he has called my work asking insane questions about me to people I don't even work with!) so I can understand the frustration of the unprofessionalism that comes with this. Just do your job as you have for so many years and if it gets brought up, just say your home life stays at home, lets talk about this report (or whatever lol.)
I'm very happy for you that you have been able to take these steps in life and, like all bad feelings, they will subside!