Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group

Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.

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Does the pain ever leave?

Meg08
Meg08
Me and my "boyfriend" are reaching the end I think. I can't deal w/ his split personalities. But I am TERRIFIED to leave! Because I don't know what else is out there, and I am too afraid to find out. I feel like emotionally I have hit rock bottom. But he is all I know. I can't let him go, it is impossible. I don't want to miss him and I don't want to regret leaving. I don't know what to do. I cry so much! Because I know eventually I will have to let him go. He is abusive physically sometimes, verbally ( severely), and emotionally ( severely). I get called every name in the book. And when we are arguing I feel that he is not right most of the time and I can be strong about it, but then as soon as he starts to leave I break down and cry my eyes out and panic, begging him to come back. I can't do this anymore.....what do I do??
deleted_user
deleted_user
Oh Meg, a few months ago it could have been me writing this story except I married the dreadful man and WASTED twelve years of my life on him. It's so unbelievably soul destroying when nothing you say is right no matter how good a reason you have for saying it, nothing you do is good enough and you are constantly made to feel inferior and frightened to boot!! I spent 12 miserable years trying to make a man happy who it was impossible to make happy and the thanks I got, he took off with someone else he met online recently leaving me alone 200 miles from my family (which i left to be with him).

I would say your boyfriend's threats to leave are probably just another control tactic but please realise that someone who loves you doesnt do these things to hurt you. I totally get the fear of the unknown and being alone, I thought about leaving several times when the abuse was really bad and now wish I had. Your life is slipping away THE ABUSE WILL GET WORSE, NOTHING YOU DO OR DONT DO WILL MAKE THINGS BETTER and let me tell you that what is out there is almost certainly better than what you have now.

Good luck and if you want to talk I'm here x
deleted_user
deleted_user
You are writing down the story of so many woman out there. I was with my boyfriend for 1 year when I was 27. I also remember thinking that I could be strong and just call him on his behavior. But when someone says and does things that feel like hits, it stupifies you and also can make you very emotional, even though you plan not to be. I remember just crying in desperation after he left my house after being intimate one night. I was running alongside his truck in my bathrobe, then collapsed on the parking lot, then drove to his house and he threatened to call the police. It was the lowest I have ever felt. All you want them to do is understand, but they either don't want to, or don't know how. Of course I miss him. He has a lovely side! I just am holding out for someone who uplifts me and cherished me and accepts me unconditionally. You should too. You can do it!