Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group

Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.

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KayteeTheArtist 10/05/2007

Even though my father was physically abusive when I was little and mentally abusive when I was older... I still sometimes feel that I want his approval. A hug. A pat on the back. A nice conversation... I want to show him what I accomplished since I *Ahem* "moved out." ...But other times I am just so filled with rage and hate when I think about him that I cant even see straight.

....I'm very confused, and I feel like I'm the only one who feels like this. ....Do you?

What is it? Why do I feel this way?

deleted_user 10/05/2007

I wish I knew why you felt this way, or why I do for that matter. Except it is with my physically abusive and emotionally abusive mother. Half the time I have dreams of never seeing her again the other half, I'm calling her to tell her that I've accomplished something new (a new article I've written, getting accepted to a graduate program, etc.). She worked so hard to get me to fall on my ass that I have to constantly show her, look, I didn't. It is a sick cycle.

deleted_user 10/05/2007

The Stockhauese syndrome we want our opressors to like us after therapy you will just want to kil them

LindaJean 10/06/2007

Yes I agree - after therapy I did want to kill my mother for working so hard to get to fall on my ass. But after some very helpful therapy - I stopped talking to her - looking for approval from her - wanting her to love me - because I finally got it - that just was not going to happen ever. She enjoyed hurting people too much to allow anyone around her to survive in a healthy way. That was 24 years ago and I haven't talked to her since. But the need to call her was huge for the first several months - when I realized it felt just like my craving for alcohol I got it - I craved abuse. It was then that I stopped wanting to call her. Good luck.

deleted_user 10/06/2007

I know what you mean. My Dad did abuse me on an emotional level but I still want him to love me because no matter what, he's still my Dad. You're human, of course you have mixed feelings about this. Sometimes my Dad and I get along great, other times, I'm screaming and crying at him.

I think that you feel this way because he's your Dad. He was supposed to help you and he didn't, but you want that relationship with him because you grew up with him....but, he was supposed to protect you and you've been let down. I don't blame you for feeling this way.

deleted_user 10/06/2007

It is normal to feel this way ,when we are abused by a parent they have had our who life to manipulate us into thinking they really are loving parents..When you lable and name all the abuse you get the anger but that dosnt straight away stop you wishing for more from them ,you may always feel that way a little, I do but less and less as I have more time away from her...my mother..

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