Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
I just wanted to ask you that do you feel angry when people generalize how your Narc X was and any other fighting couple..
Like today a friend of mine said that my husband is exactly like yours..When I know he isnt that bad..I mean yeah he is selfish and a jerk attimes but nothing compared to how my x was...
Is this a normal reaction or am I just loosing it??
Like today a friend of mine said that my husband is exactly like yours..When I know he isnt that bad..I mean yeah he is selfish and a jerk attimes but nothing compared to how my x was...
Is this a normal reaction or am I just loosing it??
People will believe and think what they want regardless if it real or not..
How this was some help
Hugs
I know exactly whet you are talking about. My wife was very proud that she never (well not that often) abused me in public. I think that it had something to do with her upbringing. In any case, I remember once when she was very angry and mean (telling me how she should have slept with some guy and how he was so much better than me etc... - the usual) when we where walking somewhere on an empty street. Then we turn a corner and see some acquaintances of hers. She quickly changed her mode and started to joke and became so charming and all her friends complemented us on being such a cute and loving couple. Then we walked on, first she wanted to have complements for not being angry in public and then she continued with what a Jerk i was for not making as much money as the other guy she should have slept with. I guess that that is just one of very many such stories.
What I want to say is that people can not know what was going on between you and your X, they will judge things based on the facade that he wanted to show. And I think that it is very natural to be angry over it. I know that I had strong feelings about it. I did not know what to say when people complemented me on how lucky I was to have such a beautiful wife. In the back of my head I just thought "You should only know how she is every night when no one is around."
You are not loosing it, you are just carrying a huge dark side of your life that no one else saw. If you talk to your friends and explain everything they will probably get an idea, even if they will never know, they will have an idea of what was going on.
Good luck with everything.