Wow that was a powerful video, thanks. But it doesnt explain why some of us stay with emotional abusers. i was physically abused by my sons father and after he tried to strangle me I left him but the last ex did emotionaly abusive things like stonewalling, withdrawing, diverting, and countering often. so often it is rediculous that I put up with it and he left me like 100 times and I kept going back with him and I think it is because I did not recognize emotional abuse i had experience with physical but not emotional. My physical abuser also used emotional abuse but I did not know it at the time. Plus I was also abused emotionally as a child and neglected majorly too so I did not think those things were wrong until I learned about them in here!! its all crazy!!

"One of the smartest things he did, from the very beginning, was to create the illusion that I was the dominant partner in the relationship. ... [He also] created a magical atmosphere of trust between us by confessing his secret: ... he had been savagely and repeatedly physically abused by his stepfather."

Wow, mine did both of those at the beginning too. I also feel lucky that I got out in the nick of time before moving totally into the "isolating" stage: at the time that I left him, we had agreed to officially move in together just 3 months later--had a place picked out and everything. Sometimes I wonder if he would have eventually started physically abusing me, had we actually moved into the place.

In response to why some of us stay with emotional abusers, I can't speak for everyone, but with me it was because it started so gradually that by the time it reached levels that I would have called "abuse," I was already too brainwashed into thinking that *I* was the one with the problem to see what he was doing to me. Guilt at the prospect of "dumping him on the street" also had a lot to do with it.

Absolutely agree. This was an awesome video. Titled "Why domestic violence victims don't leave."

Thanks for sharing this! What a great video. It so clearly reminds us all that domestic violence can happen to anyone. I always thought I'd never stay in a physically abusive relationship, because I saw what my mom went through and also because I felt I was too educated to fall for the BS. Boy was I wrong! I'm so glad this video spotlights how insidious abuse really is and how important it is to shine light on it.