Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
Pasted in from today's
Wolf's Daily Howl
I thought Dr. Phils Martin Luther King day show might be a special on tolerance or some other theme related to the great, slain civil rights leader.
But it was on domestic violence.
And it was powerful.
It wasnt about emotional abuse.
It was about murderous violence.
The perpetrator shot his father-in-law in the face, murdered his wifes best friend, and shot, stabbed and hacked his wife with a machete. She lost a finger and has numerous physical scars visible all over her body.
The victim had four children with her abuser, who abused her from her first pregnancy, on. When Dr. Pil asked her why shed stayed, she replied, He was my childrens father.
The oldest child, a teenage girl, first blamed her mother for wanting a divorce and then blamed herself for telling her father about her mother filing for divorce.
All the children witnessed their fathers attack on their mother and the murder of their mothers friend. They heard the screams and they called 911. They are now witness to violence and murder. They will never be the same.
In a way, the MLK day show was related to peace and violence. Martin Luther King was a fan of Gandhi, and Gandhi had to learn how to treat his wife with respect. He obviously did.
But violent perpetrators cant.
As I watched todays Dr. Phil, I experienced a flood of different feelings. Knowing her story, I felt profoundly sad for the survivor and her children. But then, even knowing what I know, (intellectually) about attachment and the dynamics of abuse, there were moments I felt angry at the victim for having brought so many children into the house of violence they all called home. I know. I ought not feel that way, knowing what I know. But knowing and feeling are not always soul mates. (The murder and murderous attack took place after shed separated. It was the always-warned-about separation violence, the abuser willing to do anything to keep from losing his victim.)
The woman who survived is a beautiful and courageous survivor. Though, thankfully, most of us have not endured what that woman went through, we have endured our own trials. Also, thankfully, we have survived.
Martin Luther King preached non-violence. He himself was a victim of murderous violence. He did not survive.
But his message does.
Embrace non-violence.
Wage peace.
Wolf's Daily Howl
I thought Dr. Phils Martin Luther King day show might be a special on tolerance or some other theme related to the great, slain civil rights leader.
But it was on domestic violence.
And it was powerful.
It wasnt about emotional abuse.
It was about murderous violence.
The perpetrator shot his father-in-law in the face, murdered his wifes best friend, and shot, stabbed and hacked his wife with a machete. She lost a finger and has numerous physical scars visible all over her body.
The victim had four children with her abuser, who abused her from her first pregnancy, on. When Dr. Pil asked her why shed stayed, she replied, He was my childrens father.
The oldest child, a teenage girl, first blamed her mother for wanting a divorce and then blamed herself for telling her father about her mother filing for divorce.
All the children witnessed their fathers attack on their mother and the murder of their mothers friend. They heard the screams and they called 911. They are now witness to violence and murder. They will never be the same.
In a way, the MLK day show was related to peace and violence. Martin Luther King was a fan of Gandhi, and Gandhi had to learn how to treat his wife with respect. He obviously did.
But violent perpetrators cant.
As I watched todays Dr. Phil, I experienced a flood of different feelings. Knowing her story, I felt profoundly sad for the survivor and her children. But then, even knowing what I know, (intellectually) about attachment and the dynamics of abuse, there were moments I felt angry at the victim for having brought so many children into the house of violence they all called home. I know. I ought not feel that way, knowing what I know. But knowing and feeling are not always soul mates. (The murder and murderous attack took place after shed separated. It was the always-warned-about separation violence, the abuser willing to do anything to keep from losing his victim.)
The woman who survived is a beautiful and courageous survivor. Though, thankfully, most of us have not endured what that woman went through, we have endured our own trials. Also, thankfully, we have survived.
Martin Luther King preached non-violence. He himself was a victim of murderous violence. He did not survive.
But his message does.
Embrace non-violence.
Wage peace.
I am watching it right now. And I'm going to be very blunt.
On one hand, I wondered how she could stay married to him & continue to love him just because he's the father of her children and she wanted a 'happy family.' On the other hand, I also understand that what happens psychologically with repeated abuse is almost inexplicable to a rational thinking person. But it happens ALL the time. We need more and better resources.
The trauma that this woman & her children suffered and continue to endure every single day is because of this man and yes, I'm going to say it...it's because SHE DID NOT GET OUT.
Listen to what her children are saying.
I know it is triggering but I hope everyone here watches it and then gets the hell out. The woman on this show and her children could be YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!
Embrace non-violence.
Wage peace.
But it makes sense...because slavery was the ultimate abuse....and the effects of that terrible scourge reverberates still....140 years after it ended. Dr. King....was the icon....he is the icon. What he fought was systematic abuser of one segment of our people.
And, Dr. Phil has been making a concerted effort to focus people's attention on domestic abuse. So, I think this show sounds like he honored the man who spent his life fighting for basic human rights....by continuing the fight to try to help those who have had those rights taken from them....
I love your mantra. You know I am beside you in that endeavor.