I would just like to share a mail I wrote to him when he had called me a bitch and then called again to say that I deserved that and then I will also put his reply..Is this abusive to you??

MY MAIL

I know in relation there is love and pain.
It both comes hand in hand.

But if one is in pain and the other says stop acting and I called only because I felt sorry for you then there is something seriously wrong with the relation.


If you are in pain I feel the pain.
I didnt sleep all night yest. because I did something which made you angry.
I call you up because I can't sleep after a fight not to show my attitude.
When you love someone you can't see that person in pain...
Atleast I can't.

I have sooo many times got angry at you.Uncountable times..
But I never abuse you.I never say you are acting when you say you rnt feeling good, I dont say fucking you or anything bad.
I have never used one abusive word against you because I know it hurts real bad when someone you love says something soo bad.

All night I was thinking that what did I do sooo wrong that you did what you did.

Being angry and saying things are two different things.

You say I force you to be abusive.
But that isn't true.
You just don't abuse people you love whatever they do.

I always apologize when I say something rude to you immediately.
For me rude is when I raise my voice.
I call back just to tell you that I am feeling bad that I hurt you.
I don't say that you deserved it as you talked in such a way that I had to be rude to you.Never.

Now my tears and pain are just an act for you.

No you are not wrong.I am wrong to ever think that you will love me and not abuse me.

I am very bad.I agree.I am not a perfect girl but I aint that bad too that I deserve to hear that I act when I cry and get abused.

Just take care of yourself and control your anger for your own sake.

This anger won't get you anything except broken hearts of people you love around you.


HIS REPLY

i am in pain too. you said OK, and this is happening since last few months. ur always like OK !

relation cant be one way. always u say negative and i bow down. while when im negative u just say OK !

it cant be one way highway. from the day i compromised, seems i have compromised for life. i have to be a dog to ensure we dnt fight. i have to bow down infront of u evrytime and understand ur probs while you never compromise or share my problems. my life in mumbai is so fuckedup but how will u find time from ur problems and negativity

i didnt abuse u, i warned u 50 times plz hangup i dnt wanna talk, but u challenge me by purposefully not hanging up and not listening to me.

you cant do this with me, i wont allow.

ill be very rude and harsh, it hurts me more than you, but i dont show while u always show asif you the only one in this world with pain.

we have spoilt things, and you dont do anything to make it better, instead u always demand the other person to make evrything better while you sit and keep talking negative.

i feel miserbale, u dnt know anything abt leo's, throw that linda goodman book out.


MY REPLY

I was in office till late.I said Ok as I was bugged at that time.
I did call u within 5 mins to explain and say atleast u pls understand my situation.
But you didnt see that.

I said Ok when u said wont come on 2nd.
But as soon as you got angry I again tried to make u understand tht I just said it in anger and didnt mean that I dont care.

I do a lott for this relation and same goes for u.
You have also done a lott but nowadays you want me to behave the way i was 5 years back.
No I cant change myself back even if I want to.

I have become this person who is more mature.
But that doesnt say that I dont care.

Whenevr thr is a fight I always call back and never say oh he will call me.
yesterday also I smsed and called you.
Anyways I dont want to explain anything.

If this is wht you wana believe thn so be it.

And yeah abt this

(HE SAID this to me-->)even now u have justified things, thrown loads of atitude and didnt say lets not fight, ilu etc.
see this is the change in you. coz i bowed down once, i have to bow down for life. ur not the innocent girl at all. u will now make me dance on your whims whole life.

I cried all nite.I was vomiting like a zombie.I had headache.I slept at arnd 4 am in the morning.and YEAH YOU BOWED DOWN.
WHAT IS BOWING DOWN ACCORDING TO YOU..SAYING I AM ACTING OR SAYING FUCKING..
Yes I am not innocent anymore.coz this is what happens to innocence.
You do what you have to and be happy.
I tried make u understand all night tomm and u left me in pain and slept.
Now I will learn to live with this pain.