I have been wondering the exact same thing myself. I have been trying to release my past, but all my issues from it just keep creeping back up to me.

For me... it's a daily choice to let it go. I try to remember the good things and recall the bad as a lesson learned. Count your blessings and be grateful. I heard once that when you experience the uncomfortable you learn to be grateful. That is how I choose my thoughts on the past. I hope that helps you.... :)

I'm doing EMDR with a PTSD counsellor to do just that. I think it is working . . .

Carolyne, it will take time. First off, please never get down on yourself if it seems to be taking forever. Try whatever you can, though, during that time to detach from the situation.
Find what grounds you mentally and go from there. I've heard the phrase "Let Go and Let God"...if you have faith in a higher power, let that being do the judging of the man who abused you. Relieve you of that burden but never forget what happened. Hope this helps a little.
hugs,
K

Pain is a hard thing to let go of. Try not to think of it as 'letting go', more like growing from it. Accept the pain, don't let it run your life, let it improve it. Never forget it, for it is your reminder to never go back to it.