Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
I just wanted to say thank you to all the people on this site, you have helped me immensely! when I broke up with my ex I didnt realise it was emotional abuse, I just had a very dark feeling and knew things werent right, this is going to sound very odd but I felt like my sub-conscious could see into the future and knew something bad was ahead, weird I know but I listened to it and got out of the relationship. I am still numb and struggling but the bad feeling has gone. I started looking into emotional abuse and came across this website and so much of what people have said I could relate to which helped with my decision to leave.
Socialising I am still finding hard but my mum has come up with a very good thing called Absence of Bad Feeling, which we call ABF, so when I go out for the evening instead of having a good evening which will take me a long time to have, I try and have a ABF evening instead which is working (I socialised with my ex and going out was part of the problem).
So once again thanks for all the advice etc, Im sure there will be more questions I ask in the future but its so nice to know there are people out there how understand and can offer advice and sympathy.
Socialising I am still finding hard but my mum has come up with a very good thing called Absence of Bad Feeling, which we call ABF, so when I go out for the evening instead of having a good evening which will take me a long time to have, I try and have a ABF evening instead which is working (I socialised with my ex and going out was part of the problem).
So once again thanks for all the advice etc, Im sure there will be more questions I ask in the future but its so nice to know there are people out there how understand and can offer advice and sympathy.
Glad that you got away from
the abuse.
I concur, that ABF is a
place to start. (I often
advise my clients to
get to a "neutral" position,
first.) I'm going to strongly
suggest, if you haven't already,
that you research and connect
with a therapist whose specialty
is recovery from abuse, particularly
emotional abuse.
It's great that you already know
how to listen to and trust your
inner feelings, and that will
certainly help you going forward.
But it's critically important to
process the variety of things
that happen to our psyche, in
the wake of being abused.
Also, while being social is
a good thing, dating after
an abusive relationship,
before we've adequately
processed what happened
to us, often means that the
next relationship may end
painfully, as well. I wasn't
clear if you were talking
about being with people
in general, or setting out
into the dating scene. If
it's the later, it might be
a good idea to postpone
dating, till you've "debriefed"
the last relationship.
Please take very good care
of yourself.
Sending you hugs and
healing wishes.