Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group

Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.

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Help :(

mk1090
mk1090
I have not been on here for about almost 6 months. To share brief information on why i feel so up and down is because i dated someone for 7 years, beginning in 9th grade. we have recently broken up for our longest time about 6 months. to make it short, i am also in the physical and emotional support group because he was abusive, mentally and phsyically. for the past 2 years he became addicted to drugs and everything just went down hill. i am becoming open and able to talk about it all a li ttle bit.... but to end it all he had cheated on me. it took everything for me to gain the strength and break up with him. i still hurt everyday about everything i went through for 7 years and i coudlnt be more proud of myself, but....for the past month i feel my depression is coming back. i am miserable, i cry everyday i just feel miserable and worthless. i thought iwould feel better but the pain is just sinking back. his birthday came two days ago and i decided to say happy birthday to him...which i think is what triggered my thoughts and emotions to run crazy. today we have briefly spoken through texts but i am not sure if i am doing the right thing. the anger goes away for everything hes doen to me then it comes back. my mind keeps playing games with me and im so upset. ijust want to be happy. i know that no one can tell me to be with him or what path to choose, but i am seeking advice, thoughts and support. this is so hard for me and none of my friends care anymore they just hate him and i dont blame them but the pain i feel witrhout him hurts SO BAD even though i know everything he has done to me is not okay for a relationship and no one should ever go through what i did.
IleneW
IleneW
mk ----

I'm sorry for your pain.

Tghe support of a
good counselor or
therapist can be
invaluable. There
may be low cost
resources at your
women's center.
Give it a try, if you
haven't already.
Livndadrem
Livndadrem
I agree with Ilene. Contact with an abuser can often bring back the feelings we had when with them.

Please work on yourself, on knowing your worth and on valuing yourself.
Troubled2345
Troubled2345
Hi sweetheart. First of all, you should be proud of yourself for getting out of that relationship and staying strong. Second, after reading through your posts I dont understand why you would want to put yourself through that again. I understand those feelings come and go but that is no reason to make a bad decision at a moment of weakness. Stay strong some people are always meant to have a place in your heart and not your life. Yea sure things would probably be great the first wks or month if you guys got back together but no doubt about it I guarantee youll be right back in the same position you were 6 months ago and youll regret it the rest of your life. In my opinion, I would stay away from this guy and remove him from your life completely he sounds controlling, unstable, and DANGEROUS. Not to mention he cheated on you. Sorry to be blunt. Stay out while you already are. I understand the feelings you have occurring but youve made it so far dont turn back now. With you being young and in a relationship for so long this all you know so you think its how its supposed to be. But trust me its not Ive been there. There are plenty of great guys out there and he will come along you just have to see it and finally let go of your ex. Once you let go youll be happy and be able to see then your prince charming will come and youll get treated the way youre supposed to. Pleease stay strong, things will get better if you let it.. Sending hugs your way!! xoxoxoxoxo
radrm
radrm
I have been broke up for about 4 weeks now and I am depressed but I have major depressive disorder. Maybe you should seek psychiatric care and counseling so you can get on medication and get therapy so you can heal and feel better. Sometimes we need a little help. If I were you I would stop contact with this guy and not go back with him because it will end up worse than before. You need to stay strong and heal yourself to be over it once and for all. It takes a lot of time and no contact is very important because that just lures you back in to a worse situation. You think your depressed now wait til the honeymoon's over you will be in hell again. Stay strong, come on here and get support, seek therapy, and a psychiatrist because most likely you need medciation to help you out of the depression too. Hang in there and if you need to talk I'm here. I hope your Ok tonight!
radrm
radrm
I think your pain will stay alive and well as long as you keep having contact with him. I have been using the no contact rule and it has helped me to get beyond the suffering and yes I still have some bad days here and there and bad moments where I think about him a minute but no contact is the best way to cut it off. Its like stopping an addiction and it takes strength and will power and a decision to stick to your guns. Its hard but you wont be able to heal and move on if you stay in contact. Your just setting yourself up for disaster again. I don't know why but many of us who have been with an abuser like to go back and back again and it never gets better. Take a little inventory on the things he has done to you and look at that list before you talk to him or read his texts! Remind yourself why you had to leave in the first place! Thats what i do!
gem111
gem111
mk,
mk,
I agree with the others about counseling, and no contact.
I also want to comment that if you don't want to go through the same thing all over again, no contact is vital.
The abuser will say ANYTHING and do EVERYTHING in his power to get you back. When you go back, the abuse gets worse than it was when you left. Please, focus on you and your future and taking care of yourself. You deserve so much better than someone who abuses you.
Sending you tons of support and bunches of hugs