Pet Bereavement Support Group
The loss of a pet or animal to which one has become emotionally bonded can be an intense loss, comparable with the death of a loved one. Whilst there is strong evidence that animals can feel such loss for other animals, this community focuses on human feelings, when an animal is lost, dies or otherwise is departed.
My dog passed over around 3 years ago and I am just now again grieving the loss of a senior animal I rescued, who had survived through a horrendous set of ordeals prior to the local Humane Society picking him up from the city dog pound jail.
By a cruel act of fate, he wasnt with us long, having the possibility of a brain tumor that set off Grand Mal seizures, like an epileptic and would loose control of bodily functions in the process. That didnt stop me, even though it meant broken nights of sleep, but eventually after many excruciating false attempts to give him the serenity he deserves and stop suffering, it was done. Weeks before I knew the final day would come, I held him outside, close to me and cried and cried. I was an emotional wreck when my mother passed away and this was going far beyond that.
I received an ASPCA fund raiser letter in the mail this morning and that just blew me out of the saddle, hitting an emotional nerve and too many old memories, both good and bad. So Ive been on and off crying or what I refer to as getting emotional to others. Now you have good company :- )
This is the catalyst I needed right now, to embrace my feelings and allow them to express themselves naturally
This is our story in the beginning
Willys Story
He was a pathetic and heart-wrenching sight. This brindle, 10ish something Boxer had four areas shaved and stapled from prior tumor growths that extended up to 5 across; a fur covered slit was the remains of a left eye and he looked like a walking skeleton as despite a months stay, his ribs and spine were still clearly visible.
At first we were both taken back by his appearance. He acted so depressed and rejected when he came over to sniff us. As my wife and I lingered and talked about it, other people walked by and typically would say, Oh look a Boxer! ewww whats wrong with it? and then theyd quickly move on. We too decided to look at other dogs while we were there and chose three to interact with further, starting with Willy.
He actually came alive. We were told he spent a lot of time on a hard concrete floor as evidenced from a number of callused areas on his hindquarters and joints. Plus the fact he headed directly for the basement when he arrived through the back door of his new home. He was out in the wild and through at least one blizzard and extreme nights of 10 to 13 degree cold, while running with feral (wild) cats. This is where the Michigan Kent County animal shelter first found him.
That was mid-March. I sat in the lobby and agonized over this for some time and finally concluded that after all Willy had been through, he deserves a richer life style. At first he was very shy and winced back if your hand went towards him too quickly. Then while walking him with Medina, our four-year-old female Boxer, sometimes Id get tangled with their leases and have to lift my legs. This action would send him into a panic as hed pulled away from me with this look of fear in his face, obviously a sign of prior abuse.
Seven months later his arthritis is under control with medication, so he does his horse trot, jumping in place, in anticipation of his special dinner meals (often inexpensive meat/fish, with wet dog food and now 10 lb heavier) and enjoys playing outside. Very protective, he also craves attention and appreciates everything you do; you just want to love him some more and now I know why he came into our lives. We all need each other.
Medina had a meet and greet and they spar outside and get along quite well. She nursed Willy in the early days, licking his incisions and cuddling next to him, when he wasnt covered with a blanket. They all have their spots on the couches and in the bedroom, which includes a large covered foam bed. In appreciation of The Humane Societys efforts and the ASPCA, we now contribute throughout the year so that other dogs can have the same chance that Willy did.
By a cruel act of fate, he wasnt with us long, having the possibility of a brain tumor that set off Grand Mal seizures, like an epileptic and would loose control of bodily functions in the process. That didnt stop me, even though it meant broken nights of sleep, but eventually after many excruciating false attempts to give him the serenity he deserves and stop suffering, it was done. Weeks before I knew the final day would come, I held him outside, close to me and cried and cried. I was an emotional wreck when my mother passed away and this was going far beyond that.
I received an ASPCA fund raiser letter in the mail this morning and that just blew me out of the saddle, hitting an emotional nerve and too many old memories, both good and bad. So Ive been on and off crying or what I refer to as getting emotional to others. Now you have good company :- )
This is the catalyst I needed right now, to embrace my feelings and allow them to express themselves naturally
This is our story in the beginning
Willys Story
He was a pathetic and heart-wrenching sight. This brindle, 10ish something Boxer had four areas shaved and stapled from prior tumor growths that extended up to 5 across; a fur covered slit was the remains of a left eye and he looked like a walking skeleton as despite a months stay, his ribs and spine were still clearly visible.
At first we were both taken back by his appearance. He acted so depressed and rejected when he came over to sniff us. As my wife and I lingered and talked about it, other people walked by and typically would say, Oh look a Boxer! ewww whats wrong with it? and then theyd quickly move on. We too decided to look at other dogs while we were there and chose three to interact with further, starting with Willy.
He actually came alive. We were told he spent a lot of time on a hard concrete floor as evidenced from a number of callused areas on his hindquarters and joints. Plus the fact he headed directly for the basement when he arrived through the back door of his new home. He was out in the wild and through at least one blizzard and extreme nights of 10 to 13 degree cold, while running with feral (wild) cats. This is where the Michigan Kent County animal shelter first found him.
That was mid-March. I sat in the lobby and agonized over this for some time and finally concluded that after all Willy had been through, he deserves a richer life style. At first he was very shy and winced back if your hand went towards him too quickly. Then while walking him with Medina, our four-year-old female Boxer, sometimes Id get tangled with their leases and have to lift my legs. This action would send him into a panic as hed pulled away from me with this look of fear in his face, obviously a sign of prior abuse.
Seven months later his arthritis is under control with medication, so he does his horse trot, jumping in place, in anticipation of his special dinner meals (often inexpensive meat/fish, with wet dog food and now 10 lb heavier) and enjoys playing outside. Very protective, he also craves attention and appreciates everything you do; you just want to love him some more and now I know why he came into our lives. We all need each other.
Medina had a meet and greet and they spar outside and get along quite well. She nursed Willy in the early days, licking his incisions and cuddling next to him, when he wasnt covered with a blanket. They all have their spots on the couches and in the bedroom, which includes a large covered foam bed. In appreciation of The Humane Societys efforts and the ASPCA, we now contribute throughout the year so that other dogs can have the same chance that Willy did.
Yes, embrace any feelings that might come. It is all part of the process. Sending healing thoughts your way...
One in particular is bittersweet, in that the Pit Bull/Boxer that replaced him has the same type black/brown brindle markings, similar in size and proportions and he also suffered from some abuse. The bonds are just as strong and I feel God gave me another chance to have a dog that will live much longer. I felt really cheated and was quite angry with the universe.
I didnt choose him because of this, but for his personality and way of being and feeling a connection with him, when he was just 1 year old. The Humane Society also required and Id agree, that he interact well with my other Boxer, whos acting like the dominant dog and does the other respect that? They go through this behavioral analysis and are colored coded according to general temperament. This in turn is compared to the test you take, to see what style dog fits your personality and needs.
The ASPCA abuse story in their fund raiser letter, later lit my fuse and that resulted in some venting, writing my feelings down and feeling good about what I wrote. Ill be posting and sending that later (caution: graphic ending, with my twisted humor).
I also dug up an old manual from them, concerning everything in and around your household, which can harm your pet. Like did you know that there are 16 foods alone, not to mention a few dozen indoor and outdoor plants?! If my dogs start investigating a suspicious plant, they know the command BAD FOOD! and theyll quickly walk away and towards me and then of course I give them some affection for reinforcement.