Personality Disorders Support Group
Personality disorders form a class of mental disorders that are characterized by long-lasting rigid patterns of thought and behaviour. Personality disorders are seen by the American Psychiatric Association as an enduring pattern of inner experience and behavior that deviates markedly from the expectations of the culture of the individual who exhibits it.
My sister who is 2 years older than me recently got diagnosed as BOrderline Personality disorder.
It's been hard through the year but having somewhat of a direction to head on terms of living a healthy life... Any advice for siblings? I want to help her in any way. Do I listen when she says leave her alone? That's my current stance, I stay away but try and be consistent and always love and forgive when she lets me back in her life. And I hurting, hindering, and enabling? And I helping? So lost.
It's been hard through the year but having somewhat of a direction to head on terms of living a healthy life... Any advice for siblings? I want to help her in any way. Do I listen when she says leave her alone? That's my current stance, I stay away but try and be consistent and always love and forgive when she lets me back in her life. And I hurting, hindering, and enabling? And I helping? So lost.
Maybe say, "Are you sure this is what you really want?"
I'd also make sure to validate her and make sure she knows that you have heard her.
BPD tend to go from 0 to 60 in a second. I'd try not to escalate things in the heat of the moment. But where there's a safe moment, I'd try to address the issue and ask her point blank how you can help her. And if she doesn't know, that may be true. You can always offer to help at any time and even say you'd be willing to go to therapy with her.
You are sweet to want to be so supportive. Hugs!
So far it's been a lot of lashing out at me and it hurts. This month "im dead to her."
I want to help. The only interaction we have had the last month has been our therapy sessions. I myself suffer from anxiety, depression, and ptsd. My panic everytime she tells me I'll never see her again. I go through a mourning period gorged with depression and wake up every day hoping maybe today I'll be a good guy in her eyes.
I'm not sure if stubbornness is part of bpd or maybe a result of an old head injury of hers or maybe it's just part of her character, but, even if I am ever a "good person" in her eyes, she'll be too stubborn to ever re establish a friendship. I feel like a dog that gets kicked.. But instead of learning I just want her to love me more?
I want nothing more than to be her friend. To have her respect. I'm sorry I'm rambling. I can't talk to anyone else because I don't want to violate her privacy so I can't go to my friends or husband. I'm switching therapists for my self right now so hopefully I'll get some more progress with help from that outlet too. Is there a group like al-anon for family members?
If you are "dead to her," then I'd stay that way for a while and make her feel the consequences of her words.