Parents Whose children have been sexually abused Community Group
This group is for parents whose children have been sexually abused. We welcome both Mothers and Fathers. Here, we can offer support to one another. We can vent, cry and lift each other up. No condemning or criticizing allowed. We are here for support. We LOVE (((HUGS))) !
Hi guys... So last Thursday I was browsing the internet looking for Monster families oldest daughter's information because she was getting married this past weekend and I was trying to figure out where the wedding was going to be because of the fact that I had run into her parents at a local gas station. Anyways I found one past picture that had her with someone that I recognized from my present. I wasn't positive it was the person but I prepared myself mentally and emotionally just in case it was because I was supposed to see this woman at church ladies tea on Saturday. But then that lady cancelled last minute on Friday night stating that the wedding she was supposed to go to in our area got moved to another area last minute so she was no longer going to be able to go to the ladies tea.
Fast forward to Sunday morning. We came to church a tad late so took the last row that had available seats that would fit our family and lo and behold it was next to this woman. Church was fine but after church I told her we had missed her at the Tea Party and she proceeded to whip her phone now and share photos and video of are Monster families daughter getting married! My daughter was sitting right next to me and my first instinct was to block her from being able to see This Woman's phone. Luckily she was distracted by some little kids that had come over to talk to her. But this woman from church doesn't know that these people hurt my family and I didn't know how to respond because I don't think she even knows that we know them so I played Dumb and just said yeah those are really pretty pictures Etc. But then she wanted to show me the video of the white girl singing in a different language at this wedding AKA monster girl and that freaked me out a little because I was really hoping my daughter wouldn't here which luckily the phones quality was pretty bad with the video so she didn't... But again I had to be like oh yeah really pretty okay I got to go talk to this other person now! LOL I seriously was a little caught off guard and did it know exactly how to react to this scenario. There had been a piece of me that had hoped that the wedding this woman had to go to was a different person's because it was the day before the wedding at have been advertised by monster family's daughter on line. However this confirmation of this relationship has brought up a new issue and that is I'm struggling to know how to deal with a very Christian couple that goes to our church who knows them. I want to be honest because of my character but the same time I'm nervous that they might not believe our story and relay the story back to the monster family I don't know it's all confusing to me.
We're going to get counsel from our pastor and explain what happened and how in the world we might deal with it and if we do decide to share with this couple I think we're going to have our pastor be part of that situation since he's dealt with it from the beginning with this monster family. The hardest part was listening to how she explained monster family to me thinking they were strangers to me. She called them missionaries and that they were doing wonderful works of God and that the little girl who sang the song was going to move back to America when she turned 18 just like the other siblings had and that they had only had a short week to be able to visit that the fact that the wedding venue had changed was not a big deal because it was an informal ceremony... Lots of big talk that isn't true and a little bit nauseating!
I really love this couple at church. The man is actually a pastor himself. I trusted them before I knew that they knew monster family. If you were me how would you deal with this type of situation? Would you share the truth with these people? Our church isn't huge and at least half of the women of the church and some of the men know basics of what happened to our family. Sooner or later it's bound to come out, right? So shouldn't we be the ones that tell them and take them out of there temporary deceived Bliss? I'd really like your input even though I'm also going to get many other people's Council before making a decision.
I don't know what's best here, but as this was a one-time event, she may be unlikely to spend any more time with the Monsters, so you probably won't be hearing more about them from her...right? Or do you think they will have regular contact? Sometimes people only invite a big list of guests because they want a lot of presents...that would be pretty consistent with that family.
Unless your seat-mate has children or grandchildren who might come into contact with the Monsters, I don't know if it's necessary to burst her bubble with the truth. What does it matter if she knows or not? Now, if she begins to see them regularly and to go on and on about them, then you might need to tell her that your families have had a serious falling-out, and you'd prefer not to hear about them anymore. If she asks further, you can tell her the whole story. You'll have Pastor's backing, if she becomes ugly about it and says you're lying. I doubt it will come to that. She sounds like a nice, well-meaning lady.