The odds are actually slim. Shame, which most survivors seems to suffer, makes people more likely to abuse themselves (self-loathing, cutting, eating disorders, drugs, etc.), rather than others. The genetics question is even less pressing than it may seem. People with alcoholism in their genes can choose a life of sobriety. Do you see your son developing antisocial, sociopathic behaviors? Does he act out by hurting animals or setting things on fire? These are two strong markers of trouble to come. On the other hand, if he is responding well to therapy, and expresses empathy for others,and prefers interacting with his peers rather than younger children, you probably have little reason for concern. Moreover, if YOU have responded appropriately to disclosure -- and you have -- and are helping your son to understand the difference between what was done to him and who he is, you should have even less reason for concern. Here's the first article I had time to find on the matter, and it may allay your concerns:

http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/news/20030206/do-sexually-abused-kids-become-abusers

In the meantime, please notice how worry about the future robs you of joy today. It makes you live emotionally through an experience that hasn't even happened, and never may. Focus on today and you will have your answers. Here's a great technique I just learned, at my advanced age (!!), for staying present: when you find yourself worrying, literally talk yourself through what you are currently doing: "I'm making salad for dinner. Now I'm slicing the avocado. Now I'm scooping out the avocado. Let me get the dressing. I'm opening the fridge now....." etc. It really can bring you back from a path you don't deserve to travel.

Thank you. Yes, I am guilty of "borrowing worry". I have gotten much better at being present instead of jumping ahead. I just completed my victim impact statement and my post was one of the worries I addressed in that statement. I fully agree with all of your words, however sometimes my head becomes clouded and reminders are needed. Thank you for the reminders.

I agree I don't know the stats but children that receive help and intervention early I believe are a lot less likely to become abusers themselves. I think that it takes many elements not just one. You are doing everything right and showing your son what is right from wrong. I don't think you have anything to worry about.

Speaking for myself, I am afraid that my son will grow up to do what's been done to him. What can we as parents do to prevent this? Support our children. Tell them the abuse isn't their fault. Don't let them live lives of shame and guilt. Keep our children away from their perpetrators. Don't subject them to them especially if they're relatives - protect them. Get them into therapy. Don't assume all is well with our abused children all of the time. Address issues. Have conversations as needed. Don't avoid the subject and make it taboo in our homes. Love, love, love them. Get therapy as parents to learn how to address our own issues regarding our childrens' abuse. Do all of this while at the same time providing them the most "normal" lives possible.

Thank you, Naive1, for the reminder about worrying about the future. This is a big problem for me. Something I do all the time. It's something I need to get in control and manage.

Great thread - I try not to worry because on top of our abuse, my daughter is adopted, and her birth mother had drug issues. I have to keep telling myself when I start worrying about issues we may have in the future - that it is just that we MAY have them - we MAY NOT! I love the live in the present sentiment. We are working hard to continue making positive memories and working on keeping our family as healthy mentally as possible. My daughter just mentioned yesterday that she was glad we don't see the perps family, she said, they would be calling me a little girl (about a little issue she was having). Made me happy that she can see some positives in us not having contact with the perp and his family who we were very close with. I just keep reminding her that we are doing fine, and we have lots of people that love us - and WE will all be okay!! Hang in there guys and gals, though the road may be long, it doesn't necessarily have to be bumpy. We can all hope and pray for NO problems in the future!

I think for younger kids who reenact the abuse, it was because they were being groomed and they really do think it was a game. I think that the abused children who do molest children willingly and for their own gratification when they're older may have been victims of more violent, painful abuse. Rape/sexual assault isn't about sex, it's about power and control. The rapist thinks that he's a victim and in constant torment, and that the only way to feel better is to inflict that same amount of pain and suffering on someone else. That's just my hypothesis though, so take it with a grain of salt.