Parents Whose children have been sexually abused Community Group
This group is for parents whose children have been sexually abused. We welcome both Mothers and Fathers. Here, we can offer support to one another. We can vent, cry and lift each other up. No condemning or criticizing allowed. We are here for support. We LOVE (((HUGS))) !
Okay guys... I know this is going to bug you as much as it's bugging me but I do want to make it clear that what I'm sharing is not as Extreme as most of what we've gone through on this website. I'm just venting to somebody who understands why I'm so frustrated! We just recently completed my kids drama production and we had to deal with a 14 year old child who had impulse-control issues as well as difficulty in keeping his hands to himself. Not so much in a sexual manner as it was in a friendly-violent way if there is such a thing? But this kid just could not follow the rules and created a lot of situations that made many children feel uncomfortable including my own. Everytime we would address the situation with his mother her response was "well his love language is touch." And all I could think was does she not understand what she's setting this kid up for?! She even said that her son was "great at helping with younger kids" to which my gut went into convulsions!
During the course of this show, including rehearsals, he...
-pretended to be a girl
-slap-patted a kid on the back
-jokingly hit my oldest son on the head
-swung his younger sister around by holding the back of her pants and looked down her crack
-slid my 5 year old around by his feet on the floor and almost hit his head on a table leg, not stopping when I told him to!
-called my special needs son multiple names
-purposefully opened the door connecting the girls & boys dressing rooms, that had a sign on it to remain closed & had been commanded to not open multiple times, to see a girl standing there (everyone wears under clothes, so she was dressed.) However, he went and boasted to her brother that he saw her "naked" to which the kid looked at me in confusion/angst.
-he shared with my special needs son and his buddy that he knew a song called "naked."
-he purposefully tried to walk into my bathroom stall when I was helping the baby go to the bathroom and he KNEW I was in there and then made an excuse about "oh, I didn't know," but didn't ever go to the bathroom in another stall. (Love these gender neutral bathrooms...)
-he jokingly punched my oldest in the stomach
I'm sure there was more that I'm forgetting but I just don't understand how his mom couldn't see the problem as an actual PROBLEM?! He really triggered my special needs child who's freaking out that this kid is just like monster boy and going to do the same stuff that monster boy did. I am struggling not to agree with him but hoping that since ALL the parents & The director are now involved that SOMETHING will change for the better. His mom has a bad auto immune disorder and I feel for her but a firm stance needs to be enforced still. *SIGH*
- The show is over. I have no idea if this family will even want to be involved in the next show in light of all that happened.
- The director knows everything. She's taking steps to rectify things with any families who were offended and follow up with that mom/boy. I do not know the outcome that will bring...yet. (I'll see her Sat.) However, my husband & I will most likely not do the next show if that boy is a part of it.
-I believe that THIS is what she's referring to in regards to love language: http://www.5lovelanguages.com/ . It's pretty well-known in Christian circles but I've never had it applied to a child with behavior issues!
All our counselors know about this kid so if ANYTHING got worse, I'm sure we could involve CPS, but at this time I think what is happening might be enough to create change.