Parents Whose children have been sexually abused Community Group

This group is for parents whose children have been sexually abused. We welcome both Mothers and Fathers. Here, we can offer support to one another. We can vent, cry and lift each other up. No condemning or criticizing allowed. We are here for support. We LOVE (((HUGS))) !

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Standfortruth 10/01/2021

I am seeking couseling for my kids. I feel like they did not get the help they needed when they were molested by my ex and taken away. I have very little family support on the situation. I had no idea people like him even existed. I feel like the police, cps and the system failed us. I had to do my own research just to figure out what happened. Any advice or support on moving forward and healing would be greatly appreciated.

brknhrt 10/02/2021

Unfortunately there are people like him in the world, unfortunately it's not unusual for the police and cps to drop the ball on counseling too.

Did you have a child advocacy center ever involved? If you didn't, you can find the closest one here if you're in the US: https://www.nationalcac.org/find-a-cac/

If you had one and they let you down, the best place to start finding support and counseling would be rainn.org They have a call-in line or chat, whichever you prefer. Everything confidential, anonymous unless you choose to give them info, and they are very supportive of victims and families.

And we are always here too! There are others who will reply in the coming days, who have been down this awful road and know what it's like.

Sorry you need this board but glad you found it.

Naive1.2 10/02/2021

Standfortruth, I'm sorry you're dealing with this. I just wanted to add that you also need a therapist of your own -- someone you can confide in, cry to, scream to, whatever. Each of us parents who experiences this betrayal is also facing PTSD, just like our children.

Also, if you are unhappy with any of the therapists you find, keep going. We don't always find a match right away, for various reasons. It's not you, and it's not your imagination if something feels less than supportive in any way. You need what you need, and I'm so glad you're taking care of your children's emotional healing right now, as well as your own.

heartsadx3 10/19/2021

I feel like I didn’t do enough either, my daughter was very young 3 and didn’t respond well to therapy we tried different types and different therapists. Got as far as we could now I wait til we need one again now that she’s older.

Naive1.2 10/21/2021

Exactly. This is a process. One therapist is unlikely to hold the key to lifelong healing for any survivor. A therapist who was perfect when the survivor was five years old may not be the right one when the child is 15, e.g.

Also: we ALL feel as if we didn't do enough to protect or to find the perfect treatment for our children. That's because we couldn't protect our children from something we couldn't anticipate or see; nor can we ever find the perfect treatment. There's not one therapeutic formula, not one essential credential, that "works every time." Our children have already been robbed of their trust by people they knew well, so it's surprising how often these well-meaning strangers actually make a connection with them!

Naive1.2 12/29/2021

Hi, Standfortruth. How are you doing?

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