My heart is breaking for you hearing this. Yours are words I said so, so many times, and sometimes still do, in the aftermath of abuse. My deepest pain is feeling I failed my children, especially the one whose father and my husband abused repeatedly under my roof without me ever knowing. Please know you are understood and right in your feelings of hate and loss and tears, and every other imaginable feeing as you sort through such an atrocity. You are suffering something with unbearable and varied emotions, and they all have to be felt and felt and felt again often to be ultimately dealt with and healed. The early stages are some of the worst, but with knowledgeable counsel and support, you will navigate this unwanted road and will eventually find treasures in the darkness that could be found nowhere else. Nothing will ever make it worth it in my opinion. How could I ever find a 'good' or reason for my daughter's arms sliced open so wide that she looks like a burn victim and that she is now struggling with mental health issues that will most likely be a part of her life forever? Nothing will ever make your child's pain 'worth' going through or this devastation you are feeling worth it. But there will be good. Here and there. Eventually. In small doses sometimes. And I will be the last person to ever say everything will be okay and work out, as I heard that over the now 10 years since my daughter's disclosure and our family is still recovering. No one can promise you that everything will be okay. But YOU can make it through with support and understanding and education. And you can discover that sometimes the greatest strength lies in what appears to be weakness and mourning. Please be gentle with yourself and this process. It is, I believe, the hardest work a mother can ever do, and you are doing it, and will do it. Caring for you...

As parents, we want to blame ourselves for all the bad that happens to our child. The truth of the matter is, the fact that you feel this way shows you did not fail your daughter.. I felt the same way when it happens to my daughter . There can be healing.. I know it hurts now, but the best thing you can do is just be strong for your daughter, so that she sees that she can be strong too. Give yourself some grace, and realize that there are many things out of our control. Praying for you.!

It gets worse. After I learned of my daughter's rape I went through her phone and found out that my daughter's mother has been supplying and smoking marijuana with my daughter nearly everyday for roughly a year. My daughter is 13. Now we're in this custody battle. My daughter's mother was arrested on felony child abuse charges and it looks like she may get away with it.

Also, the entire reason my daughter was assaulted was because her mother allowed her to skip school (for the umpteenth time) to go to a friend's house an hour and a half away from home unsupervised where she knew they would be smoking weed with the 15 year old brother in the house. Mind you, this is the house I didn't allow my daughter to go to becuase the stepfather was arrested for molesting his daughter (which my ex knew about and still allowed my daughter to go there).

Now I'm literally in a battle to save my daughter and it's not going well. DCF allowed my daughter to go back to her mother's house against the recommendation of the state attorney.

We can't even heal from the wounds of the assault because of this mess. I don't know what to do.

It gets worse. After I learned of my daughter's rape I went through her phone and found out that my daughter's mother has been supplying and smoking marijuana with my daughter nearly everyday for roughly a year. My daughter is 13. Now we're in this custody battle. My daughter's mother was arrested on felony child abuse charges and it looks like she may get away with it.

Also, the entire reason my daughter was assaulted was because her mother allowed her to skip school (for the umpteenth time) to go to a friend's house an hour and a half away from home unsupervised where she knew they would be smoking weed with the 15 year old brother in the house. Mind you, this is the house I didn't allow my daughter to go to becuase the stepfather was arrested for molesting his daughter (which my ex knew about and still allowed my daughter to go there).

Now I'm literally in a battle to save my daughter and it's not going well. DCF allowed my daughter to go back to her mother's house against the recommendation of the state attorney.

We can't even heal from the wounds of the assault because of this mess. I don't know what to do.

I'm actually the dad, not the mother.