Parents Whose children have been sexually abused Community Group
This group is for parents whose children have been sexually abused. We welcome both Mothers and Fathers. Here, we can offer support to one another. We can vent, cry and lift each other up. No condemning or criticizing allowed. We are here for support. We LOVE (((HUGS))) !
My daughter told her Dr. today that she has being bullied at school, someone is leaving notes on her desk calling her fat,ugly,a waste of air.He told her to tell me.She said she gave the notes to her teacher who I guess did nothing.It just happened in March. After everything she has been going through that is the last thing she needs,completely crushed the little self asteem she had,she said she was afraid to tell me because she didnt want me to be mad at the school.My God I feel like I am some kind of monster that she can't talk to.When the dr asked her why she did not tell she told him she was afraid to tell me,great,I am sure to get a call tomorrow wondering why my daughter is afraid of me.I think the school dropped the ball,again, should someone have called me? I wonder if the principal is aware? This may have been what pushed her over the edge.A waste of air,maybe that is what put the suicidal thought in her head.My God,we/she can't take much more!!!
I just had a thought.... I don't know how old your daughter is, but what about a pen pal? I would be willing to write her encouraging letters! My daughter is 6 and she would love to have a pen pal. It seems your daughter is older though. ;-) Here is a site that matches your child with a pen pal based on gender / age / interests. I know it wouldn't solve her problems, but it couldn't hurt. :-)
http://amazing-kids.org/get-involved/amazing-kids-penpals-program/
She gets bullied everywhere
There's not much I can do about it at this very moment seeing as though I don't have custody and cannot talk to the school...
But I hold on to the fact that some of my adult friends who were bullied as kids are some of the sweetest most empathetic friends I have - bc they know what it's like to have hurt feelings and wouldn't want to do that to others.
So hopefully this pain may have some value that benefits your child someday - as we are each learning on here that our suffering (although we wouldn't wish it on our enemies) is lending us wisdom at the same time.
Your daughter may have felt new shame in being vulnerable, as if she had not learned her lesson from the abuse, and so decided not to tell you about the bullying. She may also have hoped to protect you (again), because she knows your heart is broken already.
In any case, I would definitely have a look at the school handbook (probably online) to see the bullying policy -- how is bullying defined, how it is to be handled; call the superintendent if the rules are unclear. Then, have a direct discussion with the teacher. She doesn't need to know all your daughter has suffered if she doesn't already -- the bullying is unacceptable regardless. If you feel as if she has not taken your discussion seriously, ask her to write an email to you describing your discussion -- or volunteer to write one yourself -- and to cc the principal; tell the teacher you want to be sure she has administrative support (even though this is more important for protecting your daughter).