Parents Whose children have been sexually abused Community Group

This group is for parents whose children have been sexually abused. We welcome both Mothers and Fathers. Here, we can offer support to one another. We can vent, cry and lift each other up. No condemning or criticizing allowed. We are here for support. We LOVE (((HUGS))) !

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/ Parents Whose children have been sexually abused Support Group

Another disclosure

hopefulmama
hopefulmama

I thought we were done,my daughter told me her cousin showed her porn on his phone.I didn't want to know what but my daughter is a sharer,she loves to tell me details.I just want to stick my fingers in my ears and sing,lalala.As far as I can tell she saw girls and guys,and girls and girls.Must have been very graphic because she asked me what the correct name for sex in the butt is.This was right before the last time she was abused,he showed her the porn and said some day they would do that.The next time she saw him was the last time and when he tried to rape her.Thank God he didn't.My heart can't take much more.


wolverine22
wolverine22
I'm about ready to cry reading this. I'm so sorry.
Naive1.2
Naive1.2
I'm so sorry, Hopeful. I'm afraid that cell-phones may mean porn figures into more and more sexual abuse of children.
notalone00
notalone00
So sorry... that's very hard for any parent... I have no advice cause I don't want to say something stupid... but I am really sorry...
I guess be glad she tells you so much, and doesn't hide it.

Hugs to you..
Naive1.2
Naive1.2
This is the "Chinese water torture" method of disclosure -- drop by unbearable drop. It seems to be the norm. You've always suspected that there was more to your daughter's abuse than she had told you, but you thought she had revealed the worst already that day in therapy (I think?). This isn't worse than what she had already disclosed, but it obviously left her confused and possibly more ashamed. It's probably hard for a survivor to identify the importance of each element of degradation, and so they may focus more on the physical aspects of abuse than on what was said or shown. (Also, people are always showing each other videos on their phones, so this may have seemed to her like a normal thing for her cousin to do, even though the content was disturbing..)

It's so painful to learn that there is yet more to this horrible story. It stirs up sorrow and anger you have worked so hard to soothe (in your daughter and yourself). It raises your anxiety as you suddenly feel braced for more bad news.

The only good in this revelation -- and it's huge -- is that your daughter continues to confide in you. It's an indication of the effectiveness of all your past and present support. Even though you have a job now, your daughter knows you're the rock who will still believe her and help her.
overthinker
overthinker
I'm so sorry. I wish I had words to comfort, but sometimes all there is to offer is saying that you care. Nobody of any age should have to go through abuse, and no parent should ever have to feel and carry the pain of knowing what their children have been through. I understand your statement about your heart not being able to take much more. I have had that thought running through my head all morning.
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