Parents Whose children have been sexually abused Community Group
This group is for parents whose children have been sexually abused. We welcome both Mothers and Fathers. Here, we can offer support to one another. We can vent, cry and lift each other up. No condemning or criticizing allowed. We are here for support. We LOVE (((HUGS))) !
So most of you know my story daughter 27 disclosed hubby of 21 years had abused her when she was a teen.(her step dad and he is denies everything)
That was 5 weeks ago wow that time has gone so slow. I still live with my husband and yes I believe my daughter but have been torn between the two lives. So it'd recently been looking at new houses to move to and yesterday saw something perfect but it's killing me because it's now so real. I know I have to leave him for both my own and my daughters future but it's going to be so hard leaving him and possibly my 18 year old son (he believes his dad) I'm struggling to find the strength to do this at the moment but also know I'm just putting off the inevitable.
Just wanted to get that down in writing to see if anyone else has been here.
Thanks xx
Best
Manda xx
I m so sorry for you and both your children. It is not unusual to be more or less paralyzed in this situation. I really get your dilemma.. It feels terrible and for me it was like the end of life. I was married for allmost thirty years. Your son is about to loose his dad. He has the worst time of his life. Of course he wanrs to believe him. It will take time. Maybee he does not know that disclosure of incest extremely seldom is a lie however unlikely it seems from everybody else's perspective, or that it is normal not to tell .I believe the average time before disclosure is about 18 years. Unfortunately every hour you wait the more hurt your daughter becomes. I hope you get the wisdom to convince your son to believe his sister and the strength to ask to walk away or ask your husband to leave right now. Fighting !
You must have a terrible time. I hope you are very careful. You and your son seem to bein a dangerous situation. Is there a Chrisis center, a womens shelter or something else like that in your area? Many people do not understand how risky situations like yours may be, and how important it is to plan everything secretly, sometimes not even the police. Get trustworthy, experienced help from outside who can help you get yourself and your son safely out of the situation.
Take care and be strong !
Broken thank you for reply too well done on your three weeks dry every day will be a challenge and you need to do one day at a time. Both my parents were alcoholics so I understand how hard it is. Hopefully you can stay dry and hopefully one day slowly rebuild your family.
Xx