Here's a very short background of our story. My oldest son was sexually abused by my husbands youngest brother when my son was 3- 9 years old. When he told of the abuse he did so because he was afraid it was going to start on his younger siblings. Very brave soul! We sent the perp to jail despite the family standing behind him. We were in fact disinherited. My hubby, God bless him, stood by us 100% It made our family stronger. It was devastating to our kids. Our daughter has struggled with depression, our middle boy we still worry that maybe he was abused but too young to know or remember because he is so quiet and introverted. Our oldest went through years of counseling along with the rest of us.

That brings us to today. For years we've tried to help him struggle to maintain a "normal" life. But he goes through these cycles. He'll go along fine earning promotions at work, a good relationship with a girl, then one day when he is doing well he starts a process of self destruction. As if he doesn't deserve a good life. He'll screw up at work and get fired, cheat on his girlfriend, steal his best friends credit card, etc. I am at a loss. When will it end for him. He has done much good. I've seen him advocate for other abused kids. He's made me as proud as any mother can be and yet I can see he thinks he's damaged goods. He's angry at God for letting this happen and deny his existence. Even though I believe it was his hand that helped him to make it stop and protect his siblings. Now what? Will this hurt and anger ever end? I feel like I've cried enough tears over this.