parents of sexually abused children Community Group
This group is to help parents of sexually abused children. While our children's needs always come first, we forget that we need help too. This group is here to help. I myself have children who is victims of sexual abuse and struggle daily, with it. Please join to help support one another.
I am a single mom of a gorgeous little girl who will be 5 in a month. Over 2 years ago, she started making comments about her private parts hurting, or daddy hurting her. It soon came out that he has been touching her in a sexual manner. I had her examined and had him investigated. However, because she was so young, authorities would not do anything unless there was physical proof. It is now into the 7th or 8th investigation and he continues to talk circles around people. He has 3 court ordered visits each week that I have to bring her to or I find myself getting held in contempt. The court will not suspend visits unless there is proof of abuse. Physical proof beyond a bit of redness has never been present. However, she is in counseling for abuse victims, funded by a victims fund from the state, and her counselor says she is a classic case of abuse and has symptoms of such a victim. That still doesnt seem to matter. So here I sit, feeling incredibly guilty for bringing her to her father three times a week, handing her over to her abuser. He has a cycle. Every 5-6 months, he does something. She comes home, acting a bit "off", and then tells me he did something. I bring her to the ER where we end up waiting 3-4 hours to get examined, go through a special interview and speak with police. Then we go home, and CPS "screens out" the case because they look at our file and just see "mom who dislikes dad is trying to get kid away from dad". They dont care what was said by the child, what her symptoms are, what her counselor says. Time and time again, they have failed us. My sweet little girl has nightmares, wets herself, has behavoiral issues after an event. It just breaks my heart and I feel like I have drained my resources. The last rape kit was FINALLY sent to the state lab for processing but I do not anticipate any DNA will be found since he is sneaky and quick. From what she says, it is a very quick event and she has learned to try to push him away from her, yell, kick, scratch, tell a safe person right away, etc. It doesnt seem to stop him. And the kicker? He has been questioned in the court room, and NOT ONE SINGLE TIME has he ever denied doing it. He simply dodges it. Ugh. Thats my story. Im doing the best I can for her. She is my heart and soul.
I read your story in horror. I am at the stage where you were at two years ago. DCPP does not believe me, and my family members who also reported the sexual abuse. I am going to have to hand over my daughter to the abuser or I go to jail. I don't know how you managed the last few years, For me, I am dying of heart-breaking. When you went to the court, did you hire an experience lawyer who specialize in protecting children from sexual abuse?
Did the judge at least order supervised visitations? I am starting to feel that our country's justice system is to prioritize protecting a father's rights over a child.