I am in a similar situation with my son and I too had lost my faith. A good friend recently told me, I know this is such a big problem for you but a little problem for God. Pray and hand it over to Him and I immediately felt a weight lifted off of my heart.

I'm so happy you have a good friend to help you through the bad times. It's so important to be able to talk to someone, especially someone of faith. Please don't ever give up on God and continue to pray. He doesn't want us to be sad - it's very hard not to be, but if we turn it over to him completely, we can begin to heal. Sending you many hugs.

I had been doing better under Christmas. I was told by several people and even my doctor to continue to be a mom by sending a birthday card and not expect a reply but just let them know that they left but I didn't. I was told to make this communications simple. Well at Christmas I sent a text, a card and a gift. At least they were not returned but I heard nothing. Not a single word. I had been happy for the last few months because I had left things go and just concentrated on things in my life and tried to not constantly think about things. This worked but Christmas started things up again and so will Mother's Day. I never in a million years thought I would end up in this situation......never and it breaks my heart. Im divorced so I really have no one ( or feel I do not) except a few friends from activity groups and a few superficial relationships at work. You realize how superficial these are when you are off of work for a holiday and alone. Today I looked on my son's Facebook page. He ignores my friend requests but I could see a portion of his timeline. I commented on something saying that he looked good or that I was glad he had a good time on an activity that he was showing in a picture. Later I noticed that I am now blocked. Blocked by my own son. I am hurting so bad I can't think straight and I have no one to talk to. I would be embarrassed because reading the posts from my Facebook friends they seem to have great relationships with their children. I used to also and everything is crazy now almost without warning. I feel lonely, worthless as a mother, and just really depressed right now.

jcrown58, I, too had a really rough time at Christmas and Thanksgiving. Almost six years ago, my husband of 32 years did not wake up on our son's wedding day. He was not ill, and this was a nightmare for me and all of my five children and one grandchild that we had helped raise. So fast forward about 16 months - I had been to 3 grief groups and a therapist- trying whatever I could to feel better. I had been with my husband since I was 15. At the same time, my youngest graduated from high school and went to college, and then my daughter finished nursing school and moved with my granddaughter four hours away. Everyone was gone. I had my 4th child living at home, but he was working and in college, so I was extremely lonely. My faith in God is very strong, and I started seeing a wonderful man, and we hit it off right from the start- felt like we had known each other forever from the first day. Eventually, he moved in and my son moved out. I was a stay at home mom and an artist, but I lost my husband's good income when he died. I went through too much of my life insurance on my kids, and finally told them I could not get any more student loans, nor could I support them. From day one, my kids refused to accept my man friend. They have all rejected me in some shape or form, but the middle one, (an attorney) really has made it clear that my fiance is not welcome at family events, and she doesn't want him around her 8 month old daughter. We have been together over four years and are engaged. The holidays were a nightmare because she hosted Thanksgiving, and told me my fiance was not welcome. I told her I was not coming if he was not invited. She told me she hoped I had a nice holiday. Then, Christmas came around, and my oldest and his family had just moved into a new house, so they wanted to host the family Christmas. Again, he was not welcome, and I did not go. I sent gifts to all the grands, but heard nothing from the parents. My ten year old granddaughter had to sneak in the bathroom and call to thank me. I have not seen my middle daughter's baby since last summer, and she won't answer texts or calls. She told me she loves me, but we are at an impasse. My heart is broken, and I had the worst Christmas of my life. None of my kids came to see me at all. It seems she has poisoned everyone against me. My other daughter with the 10 yr old granddaughter has announced she will never come to our home again if he is here. He has spent a fortune on her and her daughter, and she always loved him, but now, he is a monster and they want nothing to do with him. We had a nasty time during the summer where we almost split. My girls think he is abusive and an alcoholic. He is not either. He has been nothing but good to them, and supports me completely. We love each other, and we are each others' future-, not my children. They never contact me- I have to contact them. I haven't had a gift for any holiday, birthday, or Mother's day in years. I get a two word text from most of them- Happy Birthday. My heart is destroyed over this. I cry every day, and like someone else said, I never EVER would have thought they would behave like this. They know parents die - and they could spend time with me, but they just don't want me in their lives if I am going to have my fiance. I see a couple of the grands by myself once in awhile, but I really am not going to abandon my fiance at holidays for people who don't give two hoots about me. I was a very devoted mother, and did the best I knew to raise them all in the church and their father must be turning over in his urn....:) Some days I feel like I must have really done something horrible to deserve this, and other days I know I don't deserve this. I didn't divorce their father, I haven't neglected them. I just have to look for happiness where I can find it, and if I sat around and waited for them to contact me, I would wait forever. I have finally decided that this is the way it is, and that I will just stay close to God and continue to pray for my family to be reconciled. In the meanwhile, I must move forward with my life, and I try to stay positive as much as possible. It is really a lot like a loss to death, but the loss to death was not a loss by his choice. They are making these choices, and I just cannot understand them. I try to stay focused on the things I have to be grateful for. "Gratitude is the antidote for hopelessness"- Matthew Kelly. It really is!