I am new to this support forum, and I feel your frustration, so I at least wanted to give you a response. I'm finding how hard it is to find support for parents like "us".

I'm the father of an incredible 10 yr old girl, who is the sweetest child on the face of this planet . . . when she's medicated. Otherwise, it is like we have a devil child living in our home. She was diagnosed several years ago, but due to medication side effects, we've had to change her meds from time to time.

Her current regimen has been very difficult on everyone. In fact, we just returned from a week in Cancun and all I can say is, it's good to be home. When her meds are just a little late, anything can happen, and I mean anything! She even drew blood on me for the first time this past week.

To make things worse, my wife and I approach her in very different ways. I am the "caregiver" and my wife tends to be the "disciplinarian", showing no compassion, caring or understanding about what our poor daughter is going through. My heart breaks when I see my daughter's eyes, knowing that she doesn't want to be like this, she just wants to be "normal".

Anyway, I didn't really address your concerns, but you need to know that you're not alone.

Have you tried a longer acting medication. My son takes concerts at 8:30 and it lasts until about 6 or 7 with a gradual wearing off. He skips weekends and holidays as his appetite is greatly affected. It does get a little easier as they age, so hang in there!

Thanks For sharing Your Situation with Me. My Wife Is The Exact Same way Brother, She teaches All Day Then Comes Home To Our Stressful Situation. So She Tends To Lose Her Cool A Lot Sooner Than Me. Sometimes Listing To The tone In Her Voice With Our Boy Stresses Me Out More Than He Does. I Guess We Can Only Take One Day At A time. I Wish You The Best Of Luck.

I could have written your post! My son is 7. When he is on his meds he is such a sweet, good boy. But in the evenings, he is a totally different person! He is all over the place and very often disrespectful. Even if I were to say "eat your dinner" he would fly of the handle. I try to keep in mind that he is coming down from his meds and it is hard for him to control himself. But this can be very difficult when we are trying to get his homework done in the evening. 20 minutes of homework easily turns into 1.5 hours, with timeouts, crying, and getting up from his chair 20 times usually happening. Since I have to work we can't do homework earlier. Needless to say, when he goes to bed mommy has a big sigh of relief. So you are not alone on that!
I agree with you about the friends issue as well. Since the kids play outside in the evening my son's meds have worn off. The kids will not play with him because he says weird things and acts very different from them. I have seen this and it breaks my heart. He has no friends in the neighborhood. I try to have his cousin over for a play date from time to time, or schedule play time in the park with a kid he knows. But most of the time he is not around any kids. So sad.
ADHD totally sucks. I try so hard everyday, and try to stay positive (like my screen name). I take classes with a therapist to learn positive reinforcement behavior techniques. But sometimes I am secretly jealous of other peoples' children. Especially the ones that are overall agreeable. But then I think of what other people are dealing with that I don't (very sick children) and I feel guilty for being jealous :) Totally a no win. And I worry about my son managing this horrible disibility for the rest of his life - college, a job, high school. I wish I could look forward to some of this, but I am so afraid for my son. ADHD does truly suck and I hate it.

Positive, I also Have Felt jealous About The Other Parents At The School, Or At The restaurants Who Have There Little Perfect Well Behaved Children. Honestly It Makes Me Sick To Hear Some Of These Parents Complain About The Things They Struggle With. I Haven't Told To Many People About My Sons Adhd. I've Been Thinking About Starting Some Kind Of Place For Kids With Adhd To Go. So They Can Play With Other Kids. And Parents Could Actually Talk To Other Parents Who Know.

Father, that is such a wonderful idea. I would like one in my area. My closest friends who i consider like family try very hard woth my son but their kids are very well behaved so they get short fused with my son. Its so frustrating. And one of them will get upset with me because i dont get so strict. I just wish she could could walk a mile in my shoes. The constant stress and calls and routine and therapy. Its exhuasting. What really sucks is if we have good day then rough night or rough day good night. Homework is a chore. My son will even get frustrated and say "i am trying my best but i cant be like everyone else. He is harder on himself then he should be and he just gives up. I wish more people can understand that alot of times its a "i cant" and not an "i wont". Our kids just think and function differently.

Father, I think that is a wonderful idea - to start an event where ADHD kids can get together. If there was something like that here I'd totally attend! I do not generally talk with other parents about my son's ADHD either, they will just never understand. It made me smile when you said you were secretly jealous of other peoples' kids too :) And I also want to smack other parents when they complain about totally minor things about their kids. Ha!
Sorry for the late response - we went on vacation. It went much better this year thanks to medication I'm sure. Son seemed to have a little anxiety though. Previous years were a total nightmare, so this was an improvement.

I'm So Glad You Had A Good Vacation, And It Was An Improvemen From Last Year. Any Step Forward Is Awesome. I'm On A Bad Stretch Right Now. I'm Trying My best, To Have One Good Night. But I'm Not Having Any Luck Right Now. Every Day Is A New Day! This Cod Weather Doesn't Help I Need To Get These Kids Outside.

I totally feel your frustration as well, dealing with my oldest is the most stressful part of my day. We have yet to get medication for her, we have a med. evaluation on the 16th so I am PRAYING we get her on medication soon to see how she responds to it, we have tried all natural things but NOTHING has helped

Good Luck.I Tried some Natural diets For My Son. Nothing Worked That Well. I'm Still Trying To Look Up Different Ways. I've Opened A Twitter Account And Follow A Ton Of ADHD Coaches, Doctors, And Parents. I Find Some Great Info There! This Might Sound Sad But My Son IS Six, When He Gets Uncontrollable I Give Him His Nintendo Ds, And That's The Only Dam Thing That Works. He Sits Down And Is Totally Focused, Lol.

OMG Father, I can totally relate to the Nintendo DS thing....we have a 6, almost 7 yr old and he is the exact same way. I just feel guilty using that because I feel like I'm rewarding bad behavior...but it really does work to calm him down!

My son is 6 also and he is the same way. I give him his iPod and he will sit down and calm down. He still moves a lot but he sits down and quiets down. Step mama I felt the same way not wanting to reward him for his behavior but sometimes I just don't have a choice. I try to only do it when we are out somewhere and he starts acting up.

I Also Feel Like I'm Rewarding Him, By Giving Him The DS. But It Calms Him So I'm Like Whatever. Its Nice To Hear From People Who Know What Its Like.

I don't look at it as rewarding bad behavior. I look at it as redirecting his attention onto something that is unobtrusive to everyone around us. He doesn't need it now as he will be 14 tomorrow and is now able to behave quite well. Be hopeful, because when he was 6/7 years old, he would sit on the floor under the table in restaurants. We eventually just let him as it was too much fighting to get him out. The DS and the ipod really helped, so it redirected him in a more socially acceptable manner. He could sit through a meal as long as he had his gadgets.