I had this very experience today, my son is so angry with my for sticking by his sister who is an addict that we can't speak without fighting. He sent me 3 text messages today to let me know how he feels and we live in the same house. It is very sad.

Hmm. We argue in person and make up via text. But he lives 75 miles away, so... Maybe the texting is effective because, sadly, we can't be near each other now without arguling?

By the way, we had some serious resentment from my son's younger brother before we got him into treatment. Siblings really suffer - especially if they are in the same household. And no matter what he has told you - he hasn't told you everything she has done, I promise. Sibs also walk a weird line of wanting not tattle.

I find a lot of my friends prefer texting over conversations so it isn't just our kids or addict kids who are mad at us that text.

I know when my relationship with my son wasn't the best - it did help having some kind of connection - even though texting seemed so impersonal. Sometimes he won't even answer them because he was mad at us. So I changed myself so that he wanted to respond to me and it worked! Even though he still doesn't like to talk much - he ends his texts with "I love you".

I attribute two things to this. Al Anon, prayer, and his drug choice change. It takes time to rebuild but it's possible. If you google "Stay Close" by Libby Cadaldi (i think it's the spelling) there is an eleven minute video of her and her son talking about their journey and how they managed to have a good relationship even though he was a struggling heroin addict. Very powerful.