Parenting 'Tweens (9-12) Support Group

This community is focused on the joys, challenges and concerns faced by parents of tweens (9 to 11 year olds). The major areas of child development include: physical development, perception and sensory development, communication and language development, cognitive development, emotional development and social development.

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pickingpieces 04/10/2016

got pregnant at 22. somewhere I had gotten the idea if I got pregnant it was my responsibly to raise that child, despite of countless reasons for not being ready. didn't believe in abortion, adoption. now as much as I love her ive found myself over the years hating myself in my depression for wishing I hadn't had her. this makes me disgusted with myself, ashamed. parenting takes more than I have to give every day but I still keep trying and doing my best.I wasn't ready. and I'm still not. mental.illness takes so much away from my life not to mention what I should be able to give her. she'll be 11 in July. idek what I'm asking here. just venting I guess cuz its been a hard day. I'm getting alot of nasty looks, "why are you being like this? I didn't do anything to you!" challenges and arguing, she acts like a teenager. I'm exhausted. ashamed of myself for not being more... able to handle it the right way when in my illnesses I can't even take care of myself.
I just want to run away screaming and disappear but here I am still trying every day no matter how much I break down at the end of it. I guess there's that at least.

wishihadknown 04/12/2016

Hi Pickingpieces, first off I am sorry you were having such a stressful day. Life is hard and so is parenting even on a good day. You did not get pregnant on your own and both of you should have had support along the way. Work on your self through therapy. Ultimately if you are strong both you and your daughter will be happier. She is picking up on all your stresses and probably feels as helpless as you do. Hugs to you both.

Jackrussell123 01/05/2018

Hi PickingPeices, I don't have any real words of wisdom, but as a mom who also suffers depression I know how hard it is, having to push yourself with every fibre of your being to do the most smallest of things like getting up, showering, making food..... let alone looking after other people.
But I find my children my motivation, I try and look as it like they've helped me with out them I wouldn't have a reason to have to get up, wash, feed. Like you I had my son when I was young and not ready. ..... keep going! Your doing the best you can xxx sending love xxx

Tweens 02/03/2018

Hi Picking Pieces, I see that you were in this group 2 years ago, but I hope all is well with you now. It is 2018 and my daughter will be 11 in July of this year, the irony right? You have come along way dealing with yourself and your child. It always seems that when things looks the darkest we want to give up and thinks things will not get better. However, at the darkest hour is when your breakthrough comes. Tweens are not easy because they think they know it all and they know nothing about being an adult. Sometimes people tend to treat badly the ones they love the most, and one day a light bulb comes on...they realize they Love You!!.....All you can do is your best and that's what you're doing.

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