Parenting 'Tweens (9-12) Support Group
This community is focused on the joys, challenges and concerns faced by parents of tweens (9 to 11 year olds). The major areas of child development include: physical development, perception and sensory development, communication and language development, cognitive development, emotional development and social development.
My 12 year old daughter had a favorite pair of sweat pants, black with a pink stripe down the side. The washer ate them. Literally, chewed them up. We are getting a new washer, but I digress. I know she will be really upset. So I went to the same store and bought a pair that I though were identical. But no, the pink stripe on the new pair is pale pink, where the stripe on the origional pair is hot pink. This was the last pair of this style of pants they had on clearance and just happened to be the right size. Do I A. Put the new pair in her drawer and hope she doesn't notice, and if she does tell her it must have faded? or B. Tell her the truth and see if she will take the new pair anyway. Please know how much I hate shopping with this young lady. I would rather have my fingernails pulled out one by one than take her out to try to find another one. Please help!
good luck!
I think you should tell your daughter what happened and tell her that you went out to replace them because you knew they were her favorite.
Don't give her a choice about getting other ones- this was an unfortunate mis-hap for which nobody is to blame and she needs to learn to accept disappointment from time to time- in other words, stuff happens!
Before you even think about telling your daughter a fib and pull off a switch-a-roo think about this- your daughter is headed towards those dreaded teen years where trust and honesty are the building blocks of your mother/daughter relationship- do you really want to model being dishonest?
If she borrowed your favorite sweater and stained it would you appreciate it more if she told you the truth and made an effort to replace it OR would you rather she just replaced it and pretended she didn't know why your favorite sweater was now a shade off?
Parenting is not easy, but we learn more from the hard stuff than we do from the easy stuff. Have a little faith in your daughter and expect the best.
Good luck!