Parenting 'Tweens (9-12) Support Group
This community is focused on the joys, challenges and concerns faced by parents of tweens (9 to 11 year olds). The major areas of child development include: physical development, perception and sensory development, communication and language development, cognitive development, emotional development and social development.
well my 12 year old is on instagram and FB and KIK. I monitor what is on there and she uses cuss words on there. I am so upset and ask her to take them down she doesn't. Should I take her IPOD from her and she says Im living life She doesn't use cuss words around me but I know she uses them at school and on social media. Is this normal tween behavior? She is a "tough" tomboyish girl and I know the more I fight the more she is going to act that way. Any suggestions?
Yes, be strong, don't put up with any foul mouth nonsense. She doesn't have a right to any technology device at all ever until she grows up, earns a living on her own and buys one for herself. I made my son sign a contract that had many stipulations, including not using foul language and representing our family in a classless manner.
If you say that something is against your rules, then that should be the end of the story. No further reason to debate the issue, let her cry and whine and yell, but when you are raising someone to be an adult with a good solid set of values, then you have to be tough.
Maybe you need to back the bus up and take away many things she has and she can earn them all back through good behavior...weeks or months of proof. Not in a few hours or days as she will try to bargain for.
And yes, this might be common teen/preteen behavior, but that does not make it acceptable.
You made the person, you make the rules. ;)
Good luck!