Parenting Toddlers (1-3) Support Group
This community is focused on the joys, challenges and concerns faced by parents of toddlers (1 to 3 year olds). The major areas of child development include: physical development, perception and sensory development, communication and language development, cognitive development, emotional development and social development. Join to share your stories and get advice.
I have a two year old Little girl who does not like to listen. She refuses to pick up her toys, mealtime is a disaster and any time we ask her to do something like get ready for bed or stop doing something she screams no in our faces and runs away. We have tried all kinds of disciplinary measures, time outs, toys get taken, tv gets shut off, and yes as a last resort a spanking which also doesnt seem to do anything. I just had a baby 7 weeks ago and it has gotten worse only now me and my husband are so stressed out the yelling doesnt seem to stop. does anyone out there have any suggestions as to how to help my baby girl be a little more respectful and do some of what she is told?
Your daughter sounds a lot like my son, and after reading through the posts on this section of the forum I have come to realise that it is actually a common thing at that age.
I understand that it must be extreamly stressful, especially after having a baby not long ago and suddenly things are starting to become harder. I have 3 of my own, all boys ages 5, 2 and 10 months old and it is so very hard as you cant seem to find that "me time" anymore. Not just that, my eldest has autism and my youngest is teething.
I feel as if I have to operate like a robot now and no longer feel like a human with feelings anymore.
It's like this thing I saw on a show once and the woman explained a story called the "giving tree". The tree kept giving to the child, until there was nothing left to give so the tree died and turns into a stump and the child goes and sits on the stump. That what parenting feels like.
As it stands now with my son, well with all of my sons I am putting them all into nursary. My eldest will be going to school, but the younger ones will be attending pre-school. That way, they can meet other children their age, have lots of activities to do, challenges, learning and just have fun.
With my eldest, that is what helped him big time. Most of the time children act like this when they're bored and crave for other children to interact with. I just put my eldest in for a few days a week, other days he stayed at home with me until he begged to go to pre-school longer.
It wont just be helping your daughter, but it will be helping you, your husband and your baby. That way, you have some extra time for yourself and for the baby and you will find things will start to calm down for all of you.
Hope this helps.
Guide to Discipline – TRIPS Approach
Talking – Whenever your child misbehaves or does something wrong, take out time to talk to him calmly. Make him understand that he has broken the rule which is not acceptable. Ask him what was the correct behavior expected of the family and what are the consequences of breaking the rule. Also, tell him what he could do to correct the mistake.
Rewarding – You can reward your child for his good behavior but it should not be materialistic always. Good behavior is reinforced by praising them often, noting down the good behavior by giving them stars or smileys on their performance pinboard. Once they achieve the required number of points, they will get a gift or a treat.
Isolating – Sometimes we need to isolate the child from the situation to regain the control. You can put the child away like standing in a corner or staying alone in a room until he agrees to behave properly. But it should be for a short time and not for too long. And of course, reconciliation should be followed thereafter. It is necessary to reassure the child that you love him.
Penalizing – The two main forms of penalties are imposing responsibilities and deprivation. For older children, you can give them extra chores such as cleaning the mess they have done. Deprivation refers to the withdrawal of privileges such as no TV or games.
There are many more such useful tips and guidance you can take from www.wonderparenting,com that will help you in positive parenting. Thanks and have a healthy parenting!