Hi babyrena, you stated she has been stealing for a long time. Excuse me by saying that this should have been nipped in the bud. Demand respect. All teens will test you. They want to see what you will and won't put up with. This is normal. I've been through this and many other parents too. When your teen begins to lie and steal regularly, it has become more than a test. It is a form of defiance. I know your daughter has been through some trauma, but she is telling you, "I don't respect you enough to be truthful with you or to recognize your right to peoples property. Has she had counseling?
Call in the authorities and let them know she is suicidal. You've tried everything! Nothing has worked! Your daughter continues to lie, steal, and completely disrespect you!" If you're at that point, it may be time to bring in a third party. You might gasp at the suggestion, but at some point it may become necessary. Turning in your own child for stealing might be heartbreaking, but it may also be the only way to get through to them. Show them that there are greater consequences than just losing privileges. She's almost past that critical age where the law will just slap her wrist. In a few months she will be an adult. Depending on your particular circumstances, the police may simply counsel her and issue a stern warning, or they may send her to a judge or magistrate. If this happens, the judge will usually issue some form of home punishment, (which may entail wearing a locator bracelet), community service, or probation. In her case supervised counseling. Remember, though, this is recommended only if all else fails. I understand getting through your teen child that lies and steals is daunting. It requires a great deal of patience. Keep trying until you can't try any more, and then try again. Your child is worth it.

Maybe you could start by getting her into therapy. If she is indeed addicted to stealing, that is a problem, and needs to be addressed before she winds up inn jail. Beyond that, I have no words of wisdom. Get her some help, ASAP....good luck.

If your friend decides to do so she could have her arrested for theft...it might be time you let that happen and in fact encourage it....if she had stolen from me, depending on the amount, I'd call the police...but then I would have done it as soon as I found out, while I was still standing in your house.

I agree with Luna...have the friend call the police.

At this stage of the game, she may listen to someone outside of the family a bit more--maybe. Tough love is just that, it's 'tough' but it's also 'love'. Call the police, call a counselor...get help from anyone who is authorized and willing. Many blessings to you and your daughter.

Yeah I am in counseling right now, like I said she refuses help from anyone. She just continues to drink and do whatever she wants. I tried to get the police involved, and counseling, but when I went with her to counseling and told them I wanted her to go to treatment, the counselor turned to her and said "What would you like to do?" And she said anything but treatment.
After that the counselor told her it was up to "her to get the help she needed." I called her on her appts. and she either hung up and never went or never answered my calls.
So now everything is my fault and she carries none. I live in a small town where there is no facility for youth, such as a juvenile center, so when they get into trouble, the authorities bring them home to us and cite us for child with no supervision, sometimes the adults go to jail for there children. I have tried everything, she turns 18 in April, hopefully she will come to her sensed by this time.
I still believe that there is hope, and I do love her, she is worth my time, but she just lost at the moment

I'm sorry to hear that babyrena, unfortunately she will learn the hard way, and maybe the next time if she steals and get arrested she will hit rock bottom and maybe she will seek help on her own, and hopefully she will reflect back on how you tried to help her. Good Luck.

I didn't read the entire thread. But I remember a time when my sister was 15 or 16. I am 7 years older than her. She and a friend got caught stealing some cheap jewelry from a department store. Our mom was furious, and of course the police were involved. My sister was sentenced to do community service hours at the local animal shelter. It was gut wrenching for my sister to have to do this every Saturday early in the morning till mid afternoon for months. But she learned her lesson. My son is currently in counseling for a behavior issue, but the counselor says that the punishment has to pretty much devistate the child for them to understand the consequince. So my son has been without his new laptop he got on Christmas since the week after Christmas. And he is no longer allowed to participate at the school computer lab. And being on the computer is something he enjoys quite a bit. This may or may not help, but try to think of something that would be devistating for her to be without.