Parenting Teenagers (12-18) Support Group

This community is focused on the joys, challenges and concerns faced by parents of teenagers (12 to 18 year olds). The major areas of child development include: physical development, perception and sensory development, communication and language development, cognitive development, emotional development and social development.

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NiaBerry 03/24/2013

I don't know to say to my son. I caught him looking up cartoon porn parodies online. As a mother, I don't usually deal with this aspect of my boys' lives. I let their stepfather handle it, but I feel that this needs my attention since their stepfather seems to think that porn is like some kind of rite of passage for young men. He stepped into their lives just two years ago and has been wonderful, but this one subject we disagree on. He feels that I am overreacting, but even though it is just cartoons, it is still porn!!

What do I say to him? His stepfather would talk with him if I insist, but I don't know. Should I push him to talk to our son about the porn or just do as he says and see where it goes? I do know one thing I can do. I am placing parental controls on my laptop asap!

MickKay 03/25/2013

Another man's point of view:

1) it is a n'normal' boy activity so do not panic

2) it is not a normal activity for a parent to endorse, so do react

That's my opinion in a nutshell.

Finally - it is best for you to address because it is your feelings; asking another parent to accept a separate point of view is different from asking them to carry the banner.

lexisgirl 03/25/2013

I agree it is a big deal but one that many kids check out. When my son was 13, I found out he was looking at porn. We talked about it openly. He was curious as most boys are. He wanted to know what sex should look like. He wanted to know what the body parts look like. What we did talk about is that it is normal to be a curious boy but porn is pretty dirty and not a true representation of loving sex. It can become addictive and result in unreal expectations of sex and women in general.

My rule for my son is to not be a pervert about it. I believe it has all but stopped over the last 3 years.

NiaBerry 04/09/2013

Thank you both for the advice. I did step back and allow my fiance handle this situation and it turned out to be the best thing I could have done. The had a private talk. My son got all his questions answered and has ceased with his porn watching. It was like lexisgirl said... he was just curious.

deleted_user 04/09/2013

My son downloaded xxx movies on his psp game. There is a webpage called porn for psp. Porn is everywhere now, cell phones, computers, games. My son told me the kids at school exchange web sites. I used to take my son's computer away when I caught him downloading it. It hasn't been an issue lately...we are now dealing with downloading unsensored rap and blasting it in his ears with headphones.

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