I'm so sorry to hear about this. I know it's very upsetting to you but how is your son handling it? Is he upset about the possibility of losing "soccer" playing time?

Also, why didn't the home testing kits work? I ordered mine on line and they work great!

Keep us posted.

The kits work...but my son has had a "scattered" brain moment in the past and didn't do the test "correctly"....very conveniently. The last time we tried to have him tested at home (months ago) he messed up the test "by mistake", handing over a substance that didn't come from him, if you know what I mean. So this time I wanted a guaranteed test. He still claims he is clean. He actually insisted on going to have the test done. I don't know....we will see. If he's clean I don't know if he will be charged (he's almost 16)for possession. I think it would be obvious it isn't his if clean. I don't know what to expect.

As far as losing soccer playing time...I didn't ask him. Honestly, I think it will bother him some but he won't be devastated....I don't think... It certainly will bother his parents...he needs the sport. Thanks Chrissy!

Hopefully he is clean the pipe really is his friend's. But I remember when I was 17 and my mother found my over the counter birth control in my purse... that belonged to my "friend". Oh, and so did the cigarettes they found a few months before that. Good to do the test.

It's a long wait when having to get results from a lab. I guess the lab ships the samples to another lab where they actually to the testing. They said it will take about 24 hours. In the meantime, he's been great about the grounding. He hasn't been bugging me to be "released". And it's great having him around. He actually spent some time with his oldest brother yesterday. Maybe he's relieved that he was caught? Maybe I will be pleasantly surprised. I so hope I am. He seems very confident...so we will see. Whether he's drug free or not, we need to have some stronger ground rules because I don't like him spending so much time away from home....it only invites trouble. **I know to be suspicous about the "friend" excuse...I was young once!

HE TESTED POSITIVE AT THE LAB. NOW I HAVE TO CALL THE POLICE. MY HUSBAND MADE A DEAL WITH THEM...BECAUSE MY SON HAD DRUG PARAPHANILIA IN HIS BACKPACK THAT THE POLICE FOUND..AND BECAUSE MY SON SAID IT WASN'T HIS...THEY SAID IT WOULD BE OKAY IF MY SON TESTS NEGATIVE THEY WOULDN'T CHARGE HIM. WELL, IT'S POSITIVE. I AM NOT SURPRISED..JUST WAS HOPING. DARN. WHAT A WAY TO START OUT THE SUMMER. NOW WHAT? THE POLICE MENTIONED SOMETHING ABOUT A DIVERSION PROGRAM HE WILL HAVE TO ATTEND. AND I KNOW THE SCHOOL WILL FIND OUT ...AS WELL AS HIS COACH... NOT TO MENTION THE FACT THAT HE IS INVOLVED WITH THIS DRUG...HOW DO YOU AS A PARENT STOP IT?

Well, going through the diversion program will most likely help him realize that smoking pot is not the way to go. And once he endures the consequences brought on him when the school and his coach find out he will hopefully conclude that it "just isn't worth it" and will be done with drugs.

I am not sure why anybody will know since he is 15 and all juvenile court matters are confidential. The school will know if part of his probation causes him to miss class (excuse from the courts).

If it helps to know you are not alone in this stage, age 15 was the year that ours got caught at home with pot and by the police with alcohol. We did the drug testing on our own and made him go to counseling. The counseling turned out to be very helpful to him (peer and anxiety issues dealt with). The court diversion program was a positive experience experience; the kids with pot had a tougher road to hoe.....

For us there were several motivators --- First, it's hell to live at home and not be trusted and he worked hard to regain our trust. Two, he wanted to work and drug testing is a part of the application process. Third, he wanted to drive and any substance abuse would have meant we would yank his license. He worked hard to change the nature of his activities and friendships.....we also applied pressure and kept tabs on cell phone call numbers, checked facebook friends and so on. Late nights out and extended time away from home had to be earned......It was a difficult time for all of us.

If soccer is the motivating event in your son's life, perhaps the coach will let him play as long as he tests clean? Perhaps the court will intervene and ask the coach to let him play as a privilege during probation (along with keeping grades up,etc). Is there a different league that is not school based that he could be a part of? Soccer is so big here that the leagues tend to be more competitive than what the school has to offer.

For us, 15 was a turning point - it could have gone either way....Teens do things that make us mad and embarrass us as parents -- the only comforting thought is that nearly every parent is faced with something similar. Hope you and your husband are on the same page in terms of how to handle this. Good Luck!

Thank you for your input. I know we are not alone in this and it's comforting to know we can get advice from those who have been there. As far as getting caught by the police...unfortunately this is no confidentiality between them and the school. The school is notified so that they can be part of the consequences... even if it doesn't take place on school property. Taking sports away, to me, doesn't make a heck of a lot of sense. These are the kids who really need it. My son will lose some playing time because it's his first offense. He actually may lose more because he'll be off for six weeks recovering from surgery for a broken nose. The timing of handing down consequences coincides with his surgery recovery. As of now, he doesn't know we know the testing results, yet. Since he was worried about the surgery and recovery, we didn't want to add to his troubles. My husband and I now have time to contemplate how or what we are going to do. We haven't called the police with the results, yet, nor have they called us.

just as a kid who has been in your son's position...I'll tell you what the kids know and not many parents know...diversion program=introduction to harder drugs...and only makes you want pot more. oh, and if he insists you drugs test him because he's "clean"...he's probably not. That's what I always said to my parents and since I told them to drug test me they thought I must be clean...so they never tested me.

I agree with you in thinking that they shouldn't take soccer away! if they take it away then he has more time to mess around and do drugs! I wish the school would see things like that!! I got my sports "taken" away from me, and that's when i got into pot, drinking, pills, and other stuff..so I think from personal experience that taking sports away only makes things WORSE!

good luck with everything though...I know a bit too much about the juvenile drug world...

CALL A LAWYER TRUST ME! Been there done that. Call a lawyer a very good lawyer and let them tell you what to do. I hope I am not too late in telling you this. I see how outdated this topic is.
You like me what to protect your son, spend the money on a lawyer to deal with it and advise you. In the mean time get him counseling NOW. Trust me, something is going on with him. I called the lawyer thank god, but I didn't get the counseling and now I have a suicidal son. The guilt for him and the lies etc. are too much. Please get help for your son.