Unless your child has a health issue, you can be insured that she will not starve herself. I'd try to do the, "you eat what I fix or you don't eat" method again. When she cries, let her cry it out. After she gets over the frustration of not getting her way she'll most likely eat a little. If you never give in, she'll eventually get it.
I dealt with an insanley picky eater as well and just had to put a stop to it. I was going crazy at dinner time. My hubby was totally against me letting her go to bed hungry at first, but after a week of him working evenings and returning to a child that was trying her veggies, he understood. And as long as she tries them, that is enough for now. The more she tries, she'll eventually start liking. The whole process only took about a month to complete and I now have a daughter who happily eats her meals and even loves a good amount of certain veggies!! I vowed to never let anymore of kids get in the same habit, it's harder to break it cycle the older they get...

raising a good eater can be challenging. I have managed to raie two kids so far that have very open minded palates. I think the thing that is most important is to keep offering them variety and be consistant with allowing them to choose to try it or not. how ever not caving in and giving them th small things they will only eat (ie chicken nuggests) how ever doing things like offering them OTHER things they can dip may help. ANything that I give my daughter some kind of sauce for she will usually try. so say we are having pork chops if I cut up the chops and give her a sauce I Know she likes like bbq sauce or ketchup she will usually at least try it.

WHen your making dinner try to invole your 4 year old in making choices for what to have and involve them in cooking it. THey may be more willing to try it if they cooked it and picked it. SO say you might offer green beans or carrots (different colors shapes and textures) and let them pick which one. then let them help make them. that way they are in control BUT you are providing them with what choices you are willing to have that day.

THe probelm Im having is my daughter wants to eat like a bird and then usually only wants what is on my plate. I have cut back her portions to near nothing just so she can finish her plate. SO now I have like 4 bites of meat a small spoon of veggies ect. maybe 10-15 bites t most on her plate and she still only eats half of it. THen later she says she is hungry. SO I put her plate away. When she says she is hungry an hour later I get her plate back out. That is all she has to choose from. SO maybe instead of going to bed hungry with no choices because he didnt eat at dinner with everyone else, allow him to eat the same meal at a later time as well. OUr rule is 30 min befor bedtime mom lets everyone know bed tme is coming and if your hungry now is the time for the rest of our food or desert if they finished their dinner. If they pass on the chance for food at that point there will be no eating at bedtime. MY daughter trys to say she is hungry at bedtime as a way to stall actually going to bed. I feel mean telling her that she will jsut have to wait til breakfast and I guess she will be really hungry then but well it has to be done. Its slowly starting to work. she is still trying to control when and where she will eat but at least I am being firm in what choices she has to choose from.

Yes, like Bugbite the plate of food is available until bed time. But she does still have to eat at the table. So if she chooses not to eat with the family at mealtime, she gets to eat it alone at the later time. This encoureged her to it with all of at at the actual dinner time...

Thanks for the info. My daughter does help me pick out the foods sometimes and helps me cook it like the other day I cooked some green beans but when I put them on her plate, she wouldn't eat them.

Today, her class went to eat mexican and I thought oh no and when we got there, she did eat some fries which is amazing since she rarely eats fries. She dipped them in ketchup. She would not even try the cheese quesadilla. We had cheese dip which she wouldn't try.

I get so frustrated because I feel I'm not cooking what she likes but like you say if she gets hungry enough she will eat. I have tried to get her to eat salads with dip, carrot sticks, broccoli but she won't even try the dip or eat the veggies.

Thanks again for the advice. As long as she is healthy, I will just have to try to be patient.

I have one thought to add and thet is that bedtime and dinnertime are cranky times for most kids hy not try experimenting on her earlier in the day? Maybe she ould have a different attitude at lunch?

Well I would say this. Offer her a balanced plate of food. Include veggies or fresh fruits in small bite size pieces. If a food she likes is on that plate, fine, put one piece that is not huge. Then place a small amount of veggies or fruits with the pizza. When she finishes the entire plate give her more pizza. But the thing is don't put too much fruits/veggies - just enough for maybe 3-4 bites of the stuff she doesn't like. Too much is aversive. Pair foods she likes with foods she might try to get more of the food she likes. But honestly if you let her fill up with pizza, heh, of course she will. Be firm - you can do it mama.

My son is 11. He is overweight at 165 currently. All he would eat as a child, so I thought, was cereal and mac n cheese. In second grade he blew up gaining tons of weight in one year and got fatter the next couple years. So at 4 he was average weight or a little above average. It tends to catch up with them a little later than 4 a lot of times.

Don't let her rule her world yet. I learned my lesson and my little one is a bit better as a result. Any time a child tries to eat one food group to the exclusion of healthy foods that is a child that is running the house.

Everyone says don't worry when they are hungry they will eat. I know this is true. But honestly I still have my own issues with it. I love to give them what they love. But if it is bad for them, that isn't love. We gotta be strong. Being overweight is NO FUN.

Thank you pumpkinpatch. That is my concern as well that she will be overweight and the problems that can come from it.

I don't even let her have a lot of the food she does eat. Sometimes she will ask for more but I have to limit it or offer veggies. Diabetes run in our family and I have to look out for her.

I went thru this too and i didnt get mad at them or show anger.....i just made them what i made them and they either didnt eat or they did. i tried to make it all fun and like " mmmm this is so good the princesses eat them all the time " my kids loved only pizza and seemed like chicken too.....

if they ate they did or if they chose to cry then they did.....it only lasts a few days and then they will eat i promise!

and cut off the juice.....they like to fill up on that stuff too i have learned....