Parenting Big Kids (5-8) Support Group
This community is focused on the joys, challenges and concerns faced by parents of big kids (5 to 8 year olds). The major areas of child development include: physical development, perception and sensory development, communication and language development, cognitive development, emotional development and social development. Join to share your stories and get advice.
When your 5 year old mouths off to you, and you tell them to tone it down, and they just keep taunting and back talking, have you ever lost your temper? This happened to me a few days ago, and I slapped my kid. I try to never ever use any kind of physical punishment, but she just pushed and pushed me to the limit. She cried a little while, then she apologized for being nasty. I apologized for striking her. About 20 minutes later, she said, "I feel really really bad that I was so mean to you." I hugged her again and assured her that I love her very very much.
This was two days ago. My kid has been sweet and cheerful, but I still feel deep remorse that I lost my temper like that. I know I'm supposed to remove myself from her presence if I get unbearably angry, but every once in a great, great while she will push my buttons to this degree (like once a year).
Anyone relate to this? How do you deal with it?
This was two days ago. My kid has been sweet and cheerful, but I still feel deep remorse that I lost my temper like that. I know I'm supposed to remove myself from her presence if I get unbearably angry, but every once in a great, great while she will push my buttons to this degree (like once a year).
Anyone relate to this? How do you deal with it?
I work in a middle school. I'm with kids all day long that have never been told "NO", punished, disciplined, or whatever you want to call it. These kids call the shots, are rude, overbearing, disrespectful and generally unafraid of authority. This, nowadays, is the majority of kids. Scary.
I sit with kids that are put in the "In school suspension" room. They joke about what it's called when they get to high school. I remind them bluntly that when they get out of school it's called JAIL or PRISON.
If you could back the clock up some years and re-do somethings in their childhoods, parents who get them in line probably could have helped them to have a better future.
Don't beat yourself up for losing it because you weren't willing to just step aside and "let it go" when the bad behavior reared up in your child. Every child will rear up in defiance and what the parent's reaction is determines the life the child will have when they are away from the home in the future.
(BTW, I did the same thing when my oldest son was 4. I knew that I didn't want to slap his face again, but it made me think real hard and be more prepared when he acted out again. Acting out doesn't stop, it just changes faces. There was a clear and quick punishment waiting for him every off step of the way. He's a good kid now and I rarely have to get on him for anything more than teasing his brother or dirty towels on the floor.)
All the best!