Panic Attacks Support Group
A panic attack is a period of intense fear or discomfort, typically with an abrupt onset and usually lasting no more than thirty minutes. Symptoms include trembling, shortness of breath, heart palpitations, sweating, nausea, dizziness, hyperventilation, and sensations of choking or smothering. Panic attacks can be very sudden, appear to be unprovoked, and are often...
I'm going to try and sum this up. I have issues with my mom here and there. She's going thru menopause and had brain surgery a little over a year ago so she's home every day now on disability. I helped her out a lot in the beginning then I worked two jobs and have a boyfriend who I'm with very often. I now work one job. I work, have a therapist and/ or am with myboyfriend. She makes me feel so guilty about being out all the time. I come to my boyfriends a lot because he has a lot more to do at his house and a lot more freedom. I see my friends when they're free during the day so I'm not always home during the day either. She's been asking me to go to her therapist with her because she's still a little scared to drive but it's the day I have mine plus work sometimes so I have to rush a bit and she still makes me feel guilty for it. She makes me feel guilty that not home a lot. I'm 24 and even my therapist says its normal and she's be more worried if I was home all the time. I was having some problems with my boyfriend and have been trying to work them out too. She's also on top of me about them at times because I've talked to her about them before. She gets on my case about it a lot and I feel I already have enough on my plate trying to work things out on my own with him. He can be needy and jealous and I could be a bit needy myself but he's a bit worse and he also has such a short temper (never hitting or abusing me tho) I'm just a relatively calm and easy going person so its hard for me to understand. His dad fixed my car after a little fender bender and my mother and step dad made me feel so guilty saying I didn't even ask and the cars not on myname and were being so ungrateful. The insurance company is taking care of the other persons ddamage and doesn't need to see the little dent I had in mine but they're still insisting and when I got upset with her she tells me not to give her an attitude and makes me feel even more guilty. Don't get me wrong, my mother is a great person and does a lot for me but she is very hard to deal with and can be very needy as well. I feel guilty for so many things in life and I rly blame her for always making me feel like I had things to feel guilty for constantly. I mean this is a summary of everything. I always llook for approval from others and will get upset if someone doesn't like me and ask over and over if they like my boyfriend because that's important to me too. Its just a frustrating way for me to feel all the time and I don't know how to handle it. It feels good letting it out butiI'm still not sure if I covered everything right. I appreciate any input and thank all of you for always being so kind.
Have you considered doing a joint therapy session (or multiple sessions) with your mom? I think that I would feel exactly as you do in your situation, but I'll bet your mom is depressed and having a tough time feeling significant. It's no excuse to create a 24-hour guilt trip on your daughter, of course, but maybe if you could both express how you're feeling with one of your therapists there to kind of guide the discussion and mediate, you two could both feel heard and move forward from there? Just one suggestion, of course.
And please don't put up with more than you should from your boyfriend, especially if your desire to receive approval from others might be part of what's driving your relationship. If he's making you feel badly, and his parents are making you feel guilty, make sure to put yourself first and do what's best for you. ::hug::