Panic Attacks Support Group
A panic attack is a period of intense fear or discomfort, typically with an abrupt onset and usually lasting no more than thirty minutes. Symptoms include trembling, shortness of breath, heart palpitations, sweating, nausea, dizziness, hyperventilation, and sensations of choking or smothering. Panic attacks can be very sudden, appear to be unprovoked, and are often...
Hello everyone.
I'm new to the site and have been exploring several forums. I also suffer from panic attacks but they come and go, severity changes often. I have taken Zoloft (When I was about 14) Paxil and one other I can't remember. Each time I have visited a doctor they pull out a list of pills and go down it asking me which I have tried, then prescribe me the one I haven't that's next. This is a horrible and unethical way to treat someone suffering with depression and anxiety so I won't be paying another doctor (or whoever) $300+ to send me to a more expensive place which won't do anything different or resolve my issue. I spent over 3k in one month trying 'medical science' treatments and nothing worked, now I have an electric pulse feeling that runs from my brain down my body randomly and no compensation for the damage that has been done. I highly recommend you be careful when taking your doctors word, they seriously hurt me and didn't care for a second then booted me out of the office, refusing further treatments. Even after a psychotic episode, likely permanent nerve/brain trauma and expressing my deepest darkest feelings to strangers (Therapists/Doctors/Etc.), spending all that money and time, I got no results and in fact felt worse.
So that being said I still have issues from time to time. Some days I feel fine, others I can't leave my room. Even when I say I feel fine and go outside, my brain is in constant "What is this person thinking of me? Am I walking right? Am I breathing to deep? Are my shoes OK looking? Will people make fun of me for listening to this song?" mode. I'm endlessly observing people and worrying what they think of me or how they will act towards me. This drives me up a wall mentally because I'm too paranoid to be around people for long. It's very very difficult for me to feel comfortable around anyone, even my own parents have made fun of me for various reasons to the point I'm paranoid about them. I feel like there is too much pressure to 'fit in' with the people I encounter or something... I'm not entirely sure but my panic attacks don't occur until I start to worry about how others will react to me or how I need to be around others for them to not react to me. It gets the worst when I'm around a girl I find attractive, then I'm too nervous to act right.
My symptoms usually include the tightness in the chest, shortness of breath, shaking, extreme fear/paranoid mindset to the point I 'escape' (Get out of the area ASAP), sweating a lot, stuttering over my words really really badly, losing track of my sentences or thoughts in the middle of them, and more..
I've done a lot of self-reflection about the causes of this and the only conclusion I can come up with is I'm very insecure of myself and paranoid of others because of past experiences. I feel as if everyone is watching me just waiting to call me out of something and have a good laugh at my expense or that I'll do something that unapproved of and somehow suffer for it. While the extremes of this are most likely in my head, my experiences have proven this to be true. My entire childhood life until I was old enough to drive consisted of being bullied and attacked by people just because they could. I hope that speaking on here with others or just writing down how I feel for someone to read will help in some way... I can't afford to pay a therapist 300$ a visit per week for a year or more with only a hope they know what they're doing and have a genuine concern for their customer.
I used to meditate often to help deal with these problems. I felt like meditating for a while and forcing my mind to clear do a lot but in my current environment that's not possible...
Do any of you ever feel like maybe if you were in a different environment or maybe had different people in yourself that you would less anxious?
I know for a fact if I were in a different area and not dependent on people who find my self-expression to be a joke I'd feel more at ease at least, maybe not a full cure but it would be helpful to not fear those around me. I get very aggravated with myself when I realize I've let my mind run wild with my anxiety... the next phase after anxiety is self abuse for failing at being a normal person. What is a 'normal' person? Why do I need to be normal? I honestly don't like what is considered 'normal'. I find people's qwerks and oddities amazing, yet I'm so self-conscious when it comes to me own. Why is that?
I am a freak, I am unique.
I'm new to the site and have been exploring several forums. I also suffer from panic attacks but they come and go, severity changes often. I have taken Zoloft (When I was about 14) Paxil and one other I can't remember. Each time I have visited a doctor they pull out a list of pills and go down it asking me which I have tried, then prescribe me the one I haven't that's next. This is a horrible and unethical way to treat someone suffering with depression and anxiety so I won't be paying another doctor (or whoever) $300+ to send me to a more expensive place which won't do anything different or resolve my issue. I spent over 3k in one month trying 'medical science' treatments and nothing worked, now I have an electric pulse feeling that runs from my brain down my body randomly and no compensation for the damage that has been done. I highly recommend you be careful when taking your doctors word, they seriously hurt me and didn't care for a second then booted me out of the office, refusing further treatments. Even after a psychotic episode, likely permanent nerve/brain trauma and expressing my deepest darkest feelings to strangers (Therapists/Doctors/Etc.), spending all that money and time, I got no results and in fact felt worse.
So that being said I still have issues from time to time. Some days I feel fine, others I can't leave my room. Even when I say I feel fine and go outside, my brain is in constant "What is this person thinking of me? Am I walking right? Am I breathing to deep? Are my shoes OK looking? Will people make fun of me for listening to this song?" mode. I'm endlessly observing people and worrying what they think of me or how they will act towards me. This drives me up a wall mentally because I'm too paranoid to be around people for long. It's very very difficult for me to feel comfortable around anyone, even my own parents have made fun of me for various reasons to the point I'm paranoid about them. I feel like there is too much pressure to 'fit in' with the people I encounter or something... I'm not entirely sure but my panic attacks don't occur until I start to worry about how others will react to me or how I need to be around others for them to not react to me. It gets the worst when I'm around a girl I find attractive, then I'm too nervous to act right.
My symptoms usually include the tightness in the chest, shortness of breath, shaking, extreme fear/paranoid mindset to the point I 'escape' (Get out of the area ASAP), sweating a lot, stuttering over my words really really badly, losing track of my sentences or thoughts in the middle of them, and more..
I've done a lot of self-reflection about the causes of this and the only conclusion I can come up with is I'm very insecure of myself and paranoid of others because of past experiences. I feel as if everyone is watching me just waiting to call me out of something and have a good laugh at my expense or that I'll do something that unapproved of and somehow suffer for it. While the extremes of this are most likely in my head, my experiences have proven this to be true. My entire childhood life until I was old enough to drive consisted of being bullied and attacked by people just because they could. I hope that speaking on here with others or just writing down how I feel for someone to read will help in some way... I can't afford to pay a therapist 300$ a visit per week for a year or more with only a hope they know what they're doing and have a genuine concern for their customer.
I used to meditate often to help deal with these problems. I felt like meditating for a while and forcing my mind to clear do a lot but in my current environment that's not possible...
Do any of you ever feel like maybe if you were in a different environment or maybe had different people in yourself that you would less anxious?
I know for a fact if I were in a different area and not dependent on people who find my self-expression to be a joke I'd feel more at ease at least, maybe not a full cure but it would be helpful to not fear those around me. I get very aggravated with myself when I realize I've let my mind run wild with my anxiety... the next phase after anxiety is self abuse for failing at being a normal person. What is a 'normal' person? Why do I need to be normal? I honestly don't like what is considered 'normal'. I find people's qwerks and oddities amazing, yet I'm so self-conscious when it comes to me own. Why is that?
I am a freak, I am unique.
But I understand the worry you have. I get that too sometimes. I start worrying what people think.
Then I tell myself that people who love me will love me no matter what and people who don't love me probably wouldn'T love me even if I tried to be different. I remind myself that they don't know me and that their opinion isn'T all that important to me.
Anyway, I know I am not being very helpful.
Hang in there!
I don't even suffer from social anxiety and I often have issues with being afraid of what people think of me, what I am doing, how I am dressed.
Some days I manage to get over it and some days I don't.
I really do hope you find help for yourself.
I understand. I feel the same way most of the time. In fact I felt I was reading a post that I had written. The self esteem plays into a lot of the problem. Sometimes we just don't feel comfortable in our own skin. Many time I just wanted to reinvent myself. Quite honestly, I find I just don't like people. I want most of all to just be left alone. I think that is why I panic sometimes, because I am forcing my body to do something like be in crowds of people that I just don't want to be around.
I too have trust issues. Everyone I did trust as a child and even as an adult has hurt me. For the longest time I blamed myself, thinking I somehow brought it on myself. Now, for my safety I tend to keep everyone at a distance. It is bad for me I know. I should learn to trust, but it is difficult. When someone is genuinely nice to me, I feel they are plotting something against me. Because of my poor attitude, I have probably pushed many a good people out of my life.
I wish I could offer words of comfort to you, or a solution. But I can;t I am hear to talk if you ever want to vent and let it out.One thing I could offer to help with the self esteem issue, is to find a hobby. Find something you like, take a non credit college class, I am taking this class this fall on ghost hunting with my daughter. It sounds like it could be fun. I am also getting some additional medication from my doctor to help tranquilize me so I can attend the class, plus I will have my daughter with me if I need a buffer. I also plan to tell the teacher ahead of time about my disorder, and I might suddenly get up and leave the classroom to destress.
So getting out and dealing with people is possible, it is just with panic disorder you have to learn to work around it. So I encourage you to go take a class, on anything. Forget what others think. They will play no important role in your life. What is important is how you feel, and if you want to walk out of the house, your hair a mess, and smelly old tenner shoes...Do It!