Pancreatitis Support Group
Chronic pancreatitis can present as episodes of acute inflammation in a previously injured pancreas, or as chronic damage with persistent pain or malabsorption. Patients with chronic pancreatitis can present with persistent abdominal pain or steatorrhea, as well as severe nausea. Some patients with chronic pancreatitis often look very sick, while others don't appear to be...
I don't even know where to begin. I've been unable to hold back tears for the last five days. I have chronic pancreatitis and one of the worst things for my body are these unreasonable emotions. My stomach hurts so bad which doesn't help my mood. Vicious cycle. On lamictal was on lithium but lost so much weight while in the hospital this last time that I ended up with lithium toxicity...thought I was having a stoke. It's no secret now everyone knows I'm crazy and no one takes me seriously or trusts me including myself. I would jump off of a bridge if I didn't think that my husband and children would blame themselves. I know damn good and well they'd be better off without me and my FUCKING MANIA!!! I would only kill myself in hopes that they would one day understand that I did it to protect them from a lifetime of uncertainty with me. I'm so stuck. I'm so scared. Everything hurts. I CANNOT sleep and when I do it's night terror central. That's why I used to drink so much...it was the only thing that stopped my racing thoughts but it rotted my gut. I think God will let the pancreatitis kill me eventually so I don't have to kill myself and so that my family can be set free. Please someone tell me what to do right this minute! I'm freaking myself out and now I'm out of breathe from crying so hard.
I am so sorry that you are having so many complications....we all know that pancreatitis can bring on way more problems than just severe stomach pain....sounds llike you have had your share...... since you are on limictol Im guessing you are seeing psychiatrist... ??? ONe thing for sure hun.... you are not the only one in this group who has thought of ending it all....but here is the thing.... this life is only temporary...as much as it sucks.......for now(while you are still here) try to focus.what good you can do... we all know we are not living the life we dreamed of...but we have been delt..and we need to realize we ARE alive...and find that reason.....believe it or not God does love you....and in the end...through Jesus....we will be living the life with HIM that is even better than any of our past dreams....hugggss and prayers... hang in there.......
You are not alone, and remember you are going to have decent weeks and really cruddy weeks-you just need to focus and pull through for your family-they need you!