Hi - I am new to this site. My son is 17. He is not diagnosed but I have been pretty certain he is ODD since I found a checklist a few years ago. He has been difficult since age 2. The power even then to ruin a family day out, family holiday, dominate social occasions, stop me from visiting friends, but since he was 12 to also make my daughter so anxious that she has stomach aches and stress related asthma attacks. All my time as a single parent spent trying to hold down a full time teaching job and manage the family while also waiting for the next email or phone call from school about a suspension or just walking on eggshells waiting for the refusal and explosion when he is asked to clear the table or pick up after himself. I live in the UK - child counselling is in crisis here and there are very few child psychologists , especially if you don't have money. I had him referred for assessment a few years ago but it was hopeless as he wouldn't engage with the counsellor at all and they just gave up. So I have been left to just work this through. The last few years have been hell and it's getting worse. This week he has sworn at me every night, my daughter is afraid to be in the house alone with him, he has brought drugs into the house again, taken my credit card to use online, told my friends that I have kicked him out (which is untrue) so that he can stay at their houses, skipped college despite being on his last warning and stayed out several nights without any contact at all. This is as well as the continual casual rudeness and disrespect of my home -leaving the bathroom, kitchen and his room in a horrible state and then being aggressive if anyone dares to ask him to clean up. And the compulsive lying about everything.  I hate my life and I feel at the end of my tether. I want to help him and support him but he acts like he is neglected and that I am the worst parent in the world. I have neversaid this to him but I have sacrificed everything - money, career progression, friends, family etc for him but it is never enough. I don't feel I can go on with him in my house but there are no other options. There is nothing in the system here for teenagers who aren't dangerous according to the law but he is making our lives a misery and has done for 15 years now. I know there are no answers - I am a consistent parent, I have changed my mode of parenting to avoid unnecessary conflict, set clear boundaries and follow through on consequences but when they don't care about any consequences and are getting to be bigger and stronger than you then what can you do?? I feel like I am a victim of mental and emotional abuse in my own home and I can't do anything about it.