Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Support Group
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a psychiatric disorder, more specifically, an anxiety disorder. OCD is manifested in a variety of forms, but is most commonly characterized by a subject's obsessive (repetitive, distressing, intrusive) thoughts and related compulsions (tasks or rituals) which attempt to neutralize the obsessions.
I've been seeing a therapist weekly for the past four weeks. She is a nice enough woman, and the mental exercises she wants me to do seem legitimate and helpful enough (and are familiar to my roommate, who also suffers from anxiety issues), but she's very unprofessional and disorganized. She never remembers what she's told me to do the previous week, half the time she forgets what *she* diagnosed me with, and for one reason or another she never has access to her notes! It's driving me crazy. The center I'm going to is a small one staffed with really lovely support people, and I do really like the psychiatrist I've seen. But I can't handle this therapist. I need someone who I feel takes my condition (and my treatment) more seriously.
The problem is, I'm very very obsessed with the feelings of others, and how others feel after I've said or done something. I know that I need to find a therapist who makes me feel more comfortable (I can already feel myself closing off to this woman, making the whole thing unhelpful), but I she's very boisterous and authoritative and I don't know how to tell her I don't think we're a good fit.
Anyone have any advice? Also, should I ask if there's another therapist within the practice I can try, or should I just go ahead and look for someone elsewhere who specializes in what I need? Sigh.
The problem is, I'm very very obsessed with the feelings of others, and how others feel after I've said or done something. I know that I need to find a therapist who makes me feel more comfortable (I can already feel myself closing off to this woman, making the whole thing unhelpful), but I she's very boisterous and authoritative and I don't know how to tell her I don't think we're a good fit.
Anyone have any advice? Also, should I ask if there's another therapist within the practice I can try, or should I just go ahead and look for someone elsewhere who specializes in what I need? Sigh.
I agree with "beatingOCD' to some degree. In otherwords, if you feel too scared, sensitive or not strong enough to tell this therapist how you feel, calling up and cancelling your next appt and going elsewhere is one option. No doubt.
On the other hand, "beatingOCD" is 100% right that the therapist works for YOU! This is your mental health at stake and she is getting PAID by you or your ins or both. If you feel strong enough, tell her with as much courage as you can muster that you feel you are no longer benefitting from those sessions and would like to move on and see another shrink at that mental health ctr. I totally get the sensitivity thing that affects some of us OCDers. I had it for about the 1st 15 years or so I had OCD. So afraid to hurt other people feelings. But slowly over time, I got over that and found some aggressiveness that we all need at times.
If it makes you feel better, I let one shrink lead me around for YEARS (mostly when I was in college and when I went back to him in my mid 20s). Good lesson for me and a HUGE waste of $$$ , time and effort but in my defense, this was pre-1987 when OCD was only known to a fraction of USA shrinks and so I never heard of it and all I got was Freudian crap. Btw, that Freudian psychiatrist I saw for years, would forget my name and call me 'John" at times. Very embarrassing for me (and for him). Btw, that is not my name and he knew me for years.
It took me many years but I still call it my "independence day" when I ripped the living s%$# out of a female psychiatrist in my late 30's who had treated me badly and I lost it in one session. I will not bore you with all the details of what lead up to that moment but she could be nasty and dismissive at times. By the time I was done with my tirade, the resident who was observing in the room and just out of med school, looked very scared and the shrink was then kissing my fanny, talking so sweetly and being apologetic. She was telling me she still wanted to work with me but I refused and demanded a new shrink. I got one. I also proved she lied to me about having free samples of one of my SSRIs in this humongous med ctr (I did not have drug coverage at that time). She told me they had none, but after that day, I was lead into an office by the resident (nice guy) and 2 bags of Luvox were filled to the brim and given to me free of charge. Amazing huh?
So, I believe this therapist is not for you, you are obviously unhappy with her, she is not helping you but you seem afraid to hurt her feelings (although she cannot remember your name). Her job security will be fine and her big paychecks will keep rolling in. I would move on either by calling up this psych center and cancelling future appts as "beatingocd" wrote or telling her in your next session how you feel (not have to go into all details like her forgetting your name) and ask for a referral. If none is given, seek out better and new OCD specialists. The IOCDF found at "ocfoundation.org" has a 'find a therapist" section for most states.
Good luck.
PS If you live anywhere near the Boston, Yale U (New Haven, CT), NYC, Philly, Wash DC, St. Louis or LA areas I could give you the names of top OCD specialists.